Flaws (Dan Smith Bastille Fanfiction)

Chapter Fifty Two - Round II

-Annie, you're scaring me. - He said, with his hands still over his face.

-Maybe we should let go... - I whispered.

He turned to see me, he seemed so deeply sad and hurt. Yet there was tiredness in his expression. Like he had seen it coming.

-Remember I promised to tell you when I thought things were too much to handle? - I asked.

-Yes... and that day's today, isn't it? - He asked, and he began to look a bit angry again. - You're tired of fighting for us.

I stayed quiet. I knew it was hard on him to be far away from me, as it was for me. I knew he would probably be able to focus on the band better if I left him alone.

-I think I'm doing exactly that... - I choked.

He stood up.

-Are you really doing this? Now? Here? - He asked with a disappointed face.

-I don't want to. - I said, on the verge of tears.

-Then why are you doing it? 

He said it probably a little louder than he meant, and some people around turned to see us. He put his thumb and index finger over his eyes, rubbing them. He seemed to be struggling to calm down. I had never seen him like this.

Esther came out of the blue then, floating in ther cloud of happiness. She probably didn't even notice we had been arguing.

-We're about to do the cake thing, aren't you joining? - She said taking mine and Dan's hands to lead us.

We simultaneously grinned and nodded. She pulled us to the tent and we joined the party again. Dan kept trying to act normal, but he stared at me very often, I didn't know if he hated me now. The dark look in his eyes had suddenly become inscrutable.

I had never planned to react this badly to something that was beyond predictable: them touring far away for a long time. I should be happy and supportive. He had proven to be trustworthy. But I had virtually broken up with him. What the fuck was I thinking?

When the party was almost ending, I couldn't take it anymore and I dragged Dan out of the tent again. He seemed reluctant to come with me, but I guess in order not to make a scene, he did.

As soon as we were behind some tall bushes in the garden, I kissed him. He was taken aback by that and just stood still. When I noticed he didn't kiss me back, tears started rolling down my cheeks and I began whispering:

-Please, forgive me, I'm so sorry, I didn't mean that.

-I think you did... - He answered with a shaky voice.

-NO! I'm stupid, I'm sorry, I can't make it without you...

-You're without me already. I'm never there for you anyway. You're better off without me. You said it yourself. Maybe you should just date the cute doctor or something.

Oh. That hurt. I didn't know how to respond to that. Maybe he thought there was some truth behind what he had said when I frowned and looked down, because he sighed loudly.

-If you aren't already. - He said crossing his arms.

-What the hell? You can't seriously think I have been unfaithful... - I backed down and saw him, horrified.

-It seems to me like a lot has gone unsaid between us. - He said, sternly.

-Ahhhh there you are. - Will said then appearing out of thin air. It was dark so he probably couldn't see how tense the situation was. - Sorry to interrupt, love birds, but the lads are tired, we're going to see if there are rooms available in the hotel, see you tomorrow.

Dan mumbled a response and Will left as quickly as he had come.

-Well. - I said tapping my shoe on the ground. - Maybe we should talk about those things.

-Do you think it's worth it?

Wow, he was taking cruel revenge. I felt as if I was being repeatedly stabbed in the chest. 

-Yes, it is. I can't let you think I cheated on you. - I said. - Let's go to our room.

We went into the tent with fake smiles on again and said goodnight to everyone. My parents hugged us and I could see my mother place her hand in Dan's cheek and whisper:

-You are so handsome. Thanks for coming.

He smiled then, genuinely moved.

-It was my pleasure. You have a beautiful family.

Dad shook his hand and patted his back.

-Hope you guys got separate rooms. - He said winking and walked away.

Dan turned to see me and I noticed his annoyed look had been replaced by a conspiratorial one.