Jack leaned in John's room only to find the toddler fast asleep in his crib. He crept in quietly, wanting to watch is son sleep.
It still baffled him that this was his son. Jack was the cause of this little life. He and Jackie made this. He thought back to conceiving John. How good Jackie felt and how she had given life to both his babies. He hated that he hurt her. While looking at his sleeping son, a picture of pure unadulterated innocence, guilt filled within him.
Why couldn't John's mother be enough for him? Why couldn't he just be faithful? Why couldn't he show his children what a healthy marriage was? Why did he have to pretend? He finally came to the answer:
I just can't stop.
He knew it was lame. But that was why. Maybe he was weak. Or maybe something in his upbringing rooted his incessant need for women. All he knew was he just couldn't stop.
He left Johns nursery to go back to Jackie's room. He needed to talk to her. He stopped when he saw that Caroline's light was still on. He peered inside and saw Miss Shaw tucking his daughter in.
Miss Shaw turned and saw the president standing in the doorway.
"Mr. President, would you like to do the honors?" The nanny chirped.
He nodded with a grin and Miss Shaw slipped out of the room.
"Daddy!" Caroline squealed as she stretched her arms out from under the covers. Jack bent over to hug her then sat next to her on the bed.
"Why were you and mummy yelling so loud?" Caroline asked curling up to her father.
Jack stumbled. His chest felt heavy. "Uh...we were just talking some things out." He pulled her against him and rubbed her back.
"You still love mummy right?" Caroline asked gazing up at her father.
"Of course buttons." He said kissing the top of her head. "Of course" He said to himself once more.
Before long, Caroline was sound asleep in her father arms. He could feel her tiny heartbeat against him. Jack got up slowly as to not wake his daughter.
He loved his children. He didn't want his children growing up the way he did with his parents fighting and his mother constantly fleeing from his fathers infidelities.
He needed to talk to her.
YOU ARE READING
Opening Up
Romance"They both wanted desperately to connect, but hadn't the faintest idea how. That's what made their love story so achingly poignant. And it was, in every sense of the word, a love story." -Chuck Spalding (longtime friend of Jack and Jackie Kennedy)
