CAUTIOUS [knj x bts]

1.5

Keeping his pace fairly slow and careful, Seokjin carries Namjoon down the hall and past the kitchen to the door to the living room. There's voices and the sound of the television blaring behind it - apparently the sound effects of a video game, which they'll have to turn off quickly if it's one of the usual action or fighting games - and Namjoon wriggles, apparently growing more anxious. Seokjin presses a kiss to his temple, giving him an assuring smile, and pushes the door open with his foot. The attention in the room shifts to them immediately, and the sound effects of the game quickly cease as the bloodshed is replaced with a pause screen.
"Is that Joonie?"
Hoseok is the first to speak, sprawled out on the sofa opposite the television with his phone in his hand. He's dressed in lounge clothes, with messy hair, but he quickly sits up and smiles warmly at the sight of Namjoon, doing his best to appear safe and open in his expression and body language. Namjoon gives a shy nod despite the fact that it's pretty obvious that he's in little space, and the question was likely rhetorical, but Hoseok's smile grows and he coos nonetheless.

Jimin and Taehyung are sat on the other sofa, with Taehyung's legs thrown across Jimin's lap, but they both straighten themselves out a little to appear clearly open and interested, enthusiastic about Namjoon's presence. It seems a little stiff and unnecessary for them all to so deliberately control their body language, but Namjoon's anxiety is a strange and vicious thing, and they all know from experience that if one small action makes him believe that somebody is mad at him, he'll spend the whole day upset or terrified until they catch on and reassure him. Jungkook, however, does not follow the pattern. He remains where he's sat cross-legged on the floor, PS4 controller lit up in his lap, with his shoulders hunched and an anxious expression on his face. Namjoon mimics his apparent upset when his eyes fall on him, like a baby basing their emotions on the people around them, and that's usually enough to snap any of them out of their stress or worry to avoid pushing such emotions onto Namjoon, but right now the crease in Jungkook's brow remains.
"Joonie," he says, voice soft, and lets his shoulders drop very slightly when Namjoon coos in response rather than cursing him out for not saying 'hyung'. He knows he isn't quite as good at catching onto Namjoon's changes in headspace as the others are, but it's all laid out for him now and he has to choose what route he wants to take with this.

Seokjin notices the tension, and bounces Namjoon slightly to adjust him on his hip.
"You wanna go to Kookie, baby?" he asks quietly, soft enough that Namjoon won't feel pressured with what response to give under the scrutiny of the room, but to his surprise Namjoon nods without hesitation. He pauses soon after, however, and turns to face Jungkook with a worried look on his face, like he isn't sure that Jungkook actually wants him. Jungkook immediately places his controller to the side and opens his arms up wide, giving Namjoon a toothy smile and encouraging nod.
"You wanna come sit on my lap, buddy?" he asks, a rhetorical question if anything, and is immediately met with a relieved nod. Seokjin smiles softly and walks the short distance to deposit Namjoon (and his blanket and stuffies) into Jungkook's lap, ignoring his own 'parental' anxiety at handing his baby off to somebody else. It's not like he's leaving the two of them on their own - though he has in the past for shorter periods of time - but his protective instincts are through the roof right now and he wants to keep Namjoon shielded from absolutely everything that might have the power to hurt or distress him. The sight of Jungkook carefully adjusting Namjoon so he's comfortable and pulling the blanket a little tighter around him quickly soothes his anxiety. Jungkook can be trusted, of course he can be trusted. Somewhat reluctantly, Seokjin turns and leaves Namjoon and Jungkook together, sitting down next to Hoseok and dragging a hand down his face.

"Everything okay?" Hoseok asks quietly, brows furrowed in concern. Seokjin doesn't know whether Jungkook and Jimin have mentioned what happened earlier, but he doesn't want to elaborate and instead just shakes his head. It only succeeds in deepening Hoseok's frown, but vague honesty is better than lies.
"Where's Yoongi?"
Hoseok seems to snap out of his concern at the question, only to switch to a different kind. He understands immediately, of course, what the situation must be, and the fact that he doesn't actually know where Yoongi is only adds to his worry. Yoongi tends to exist outside of the normal realm whenever stress is abound, spending most of his time in the studio but occasionally drifting to his bedroom to hibernate until he musters enough energy to repeat the cycle of sleeplessness. Namjoon is usually by his side, and has been for the past few weeks, but something must have catalysed a rift. Hoseok really hopes they haven't fought.
"Call him," Hoseok suggests, and Seokjin gives a small nod, watching Namjoon giggle and writhe in Jungkook's lap where he's being bounced and showered in kisses. He stays like that, just watching for a few seconds like he's gathering all the love the scene makes him feel so he can carry it through, then stands up and walks into the kitchen, closing the living room door behind him. He collects his phone from the breakfast bar and sees several text notifications from hours ago, all from Jimin and Jungkook.
Is Namjoon-hyung okay?
I'm sorry.
Can you ask Namjoon-hyung to come talk to Jungkook once he's calmed down?
Tell him I didn't mean it.
He's really upset.
I'm so sorry.
Seokjin breathes a sigh and unlocks his phone, staring blankly at the home screen for a moment before he finds the will to open his recents and select Yoongi's number from the list. He holds the phone to his ear and waits, each ring feeling like one too many.

"Hyung--"
"You need to get back here."
Both of them begin speaking as soon as the call picks up, neither possessing any patience for the other, but Seokjin is the one who manages to power through. He hears Yoongi sigh, like he's being inconvenienced, and sucks in a rather sharp breath of his own.
"I'm busy."
Bullshit, Seokjin wants to say, even though he knows that Yoongi probably really is busy. But he's busy too, they all are, and that's not an excuse even though they've been using it as one for weeks.
"Joonie needs you."
"I said, I'm busy." Yoongi's voice takes on a certain note of annoyance and exasperation, and Seokjin wants to slap him. "Can't you just handle him? It's not--"
"He had a meltdown earlier." Seokjin's voice is sharp and icy, enough to make Yoongi's breath die audibly in his throat. He doesn't try to speak again, even as Seokjin pauses to let his words hang in the air. He knows he's stabbed Yoongi in the gut with guilt, and he wants to twist the knife. Keep twisting and twisting and making him bleed as much as it takes for him to realise.
"He cried, for almost an hour in my arms. Talking about...about how he's nothing but a burden, an inconvenience. He'd already dropped out of fear but he was fighting headspace the way he used to, the way he did when he thought we'd all kill him if we found out."
"Fear?" Yoongi echoes, a certain tightness in his voice, but Seokjin ignores him.
"He's not...he's not okay, Yoongi. He looks like he's sick, genuinely sick. He was so fucking thin and pale, sitting on the lid of the toilet like I'd just pulled him out of some sort of fucking abuse scene," Seokjin's voice cracks, the way he'd tried to fight back earlier, and tears burn in his eyes in a horrible and hopeless mix of anger and despair. Things look like they're okay right now, with Namjoon cuddled up in Jungkook's arms and all of them sat smiling in the living room together, but the happiness is only surface-deep and there's so much underneath. So much that they're not talking about.
"I don't..I don't know what to do, Yoongi. I don't know if there's anything I can do, anything we can do. But...but he needs us right now. The both of us, and the others."
Seokjin pauses as his breath shudders, choking down a sob, and he knows that Yoongi can hear it but if this is what it takes then he doesn't care.
"And I can't, Yoongi. I can't go out there and look him in the eyes and tell him that dada isn't coming. Okay? I can't hurt him like that. Please don't make me hurt him, Yoongi."
Seokjin sobs, scrunching his eyes shut and clamping his free hand over his mouth in the hopes that the others won't hear him - that Joonie won't hear him break. After several seconds of silence, Yoongi's shaky breath crackles through the phone and Seokjin wonders for a moment if he's crying too.
"I'll be home in twenty minutes," Yoongi says, voice quiet, and the call cuts off.