twenty-one

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"CAN WE all just calm down!?" Richie bellowed. "And Stan, stop fucking flaunting your engagement ring, Jesus Christ. We get it, Bill's a stud."

Stan scowled, dropping his hand away from Ash. "You know Richie, because of you I might just switch the ring to my middle finger."

Richie narrowed his eyes at him and folded his arms, waiting for silence.

His eyes swiveled to Bev, who was whispering to Ben and barked, "Hey, Marsh! You're holding up the party!"

Bev let out a long sigh, and turned away from Ben, raising an eyebrow. "Alright, Tozier. Continue."

"Alright. The wedding is literally tomorrow you guys. Do you remember what I said when Stan came yelling about it three months ago?"

Ash sighed, and answered, "You said, 'I'm thinking rainbow balloons, rainbow dress for Bill 'cause he's definitely the girl, a rainbow cake- basically i'm just saying it should look like a rainbow threw the fuck up on the whole shebang.'"

"A-and I said, 'Richie, just because I'm g-gay doesn't m-mean I'm w-wearing a dress.'" Bill said flatly.

"And why rainbows?" Stan asked, throwing his hands into the air. "What the fuck do those have to do with anything?"

Richie shrugged. "I don't know! We can make it black and depressing if you want!"

"And you'll wear a neon sparkly pink suit." Eddie muttered, and Richie glared at him.

"Shut up, Eds."

"Don't call me Eds!"

"Then shut up about the goddamn suit!"

"Alright, alright!" Stan shouted. "When the hell did we ever put you in charge of this wedding? Didn't we ask Greta Keene to cater it?"

Richie blinked, and said breezily, "Greta took a leave of absence."

"And left you in charge?" Ben deadpanned, and Richie shot, "You shut up too, January Embers."

Ben's face reddened, and Bev raised her voice. "Oh, so we're going there now!?"

"Yeah, Molly Ringwald, we're going there now because everyone decided to attack me!"

"Shut up! Just shut up, Richie!"

"Wait, Richie," Ash cut in, and everyone stopped talking. "You have all the decorations we picked out up, right?"

Richie rolled his eyes. "Of course I do. Who do you think I am?"

"Wait, wait, wait!" Stan said indignantly. "You and your girlfriend planned this out?"

Ash looked sheepish, and Stan said, "Oh that is it! You are never going bird watching with me again, Brenner!"

He looked around at all of them, and then exclaimed, "My wedding was planned by an Asshole Duo! I thought by the time I graduated I would have moved past this!"

He dissolved into angry tears, and Richie nudged Ash. "What's wrong with him?"

Bill put an arm around him and said to Richie, "Wuh-wedding stress. Th-that, and the fact that you all planned our f-fucking wedding. D-do you know how many p-p-people are going to laugh us out of Derry?"

"No one's going to laugh you out of Derry!" Ash said exasperatedly.

"B-But Richie can't even make his cl-clothes coordinate!" Stan wailed.

Richie glared at him. "Stan, I'm not letting you and Bill down with this wedding, okay? So stop whining. That's the last thing I would want to do."

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