Wired Hearts (Available on Radish)

1🤖A Crappy Apology

As if vomiting up his lunch in the literal middle of an interview wasn't enough proof of Sean's incompetence, now he couldn't even rinse his mouth without dribbling all over his chin. The plastic bottle crackled under the force of his grip as he wiped the excess, slumping on the metal park bench. A montage of his failed interview replayed for the fifth time.

Why, at 29, did he only have one job under his belt? Why was he unemployed for the last five years?

'Well, the love of my life and my best friend died, and it was my fault, and I kind of had a breakdown, but you know, you should totally hire me,' Sean could have said.

Right.

Not like that kind of response would be any worse than his $11 kale wrap deciding it'd rather be on the interview table than in his stomach.

Those eyes that bulged at the pungent stew of green―judging and disgusted. He didn't blame them. There was no way in hell they'd hire him, regardless of his credentials.

As a cool breeze ran across his sweaty forehead, a ringing came from the pocket of his slacks. He pulled out his phone, knowing it was the hiring manager not even bothering to wait 2-3 weeks out of courtesy to reject him. But upon seeing the caller ID, Sean blinked. Carnegie? That interview two weeks ago had actually gone well. This was the silver lining! Hopefully. He sat up straight and answered the call in his most professional voice.

"Hello. Sean Anderson speaking."

"Hi, this is Tina Barber with the Carnegie Museum of Natural History. How are you?"

Ew, pleasantries. "Fine." Sean cringed. "How are you?"

"I'm well. We're calling regarding your interest in the Assistant Researcher position. We're sorry, but―"

His shoulders fell yet again. He really was useless.

"―we've decided to go with another candidate."

"I understand." Though he actually didn't. "Thank you." He dropped his hand into his lap, simultaneously ending the call.

A young blonde walked by in her tight workout pants, eyeballing him and his ancient Samsung Galaxy J2 Pro. She wrinkled her nose, pinched her nostrils, then jogged off while glancing at her smartwatch.

Sean lifted his arm to get a whiff, but by just seeing the sweat stains, he knew he didn't have to bother. Well, joke was on her when she got brain cancer from those Apple Airpods always stuck in her ear. Ha-ha.

...

Picking at other people was making Sean feel the opposite of less pathetic, so he stood up from the bench and made his way toward home. He wouldn't be able to handle the same judgmental stares from others on the bus or train, so walking it was. Forty-five minutes free to perseverate about what a piece of shit he was. Perfect.

*

Sean's dress shoes bounced off the foyer wall, their black heels leaving tiny marks. If he had still been living in his parents' home, his mom would've had a fit.

'Did you just kick your shoes off? You better act like you know who raised you.'

Sean smiled as he turned the corner into the living room. He couldn't go back and burden his parents any longer, but how he wished his mom was here now.

"Hey, Sean."

Jumping out of his skin, he looked left towards the empty kitchen, right towards the hollow bedroom, in front of him towards the untouched couch, and beside it to see a giant metal coffin-sized box.