Stitches • Marichat

Chapter Nineteen

"Are you okay?" Nino asked once more, his worry evident in the tone of his voice. Adrien shook his head, his blonde hair shaking more drops of water. Sitting down on one of seats, Adrien put his hand on his face, his elbow digging sharply into the wooden desk.

"I... I'm just so- lost? I don't even know if that's the right word. Confused? No, that doesn't seem to fit either..." Adrien had almost expected Nino to snap at him and let him know that he was rambling, but the teen didn't do that. Instead, Nino sat himself onto the desk in front of Adrien. Being this close to his best friend for the first time in a long time, Adrien finally realized how much he had missed talking to Nino. Like, actually talking to him. "Really, I just don't know what to do." Adrien confessed. "I have so many issues right now, and they all seem to revolve around one person."

"Marinette." Adrien snapped his head up quickly, facing his best friend in shock. He did this before sighing once again, slumping over the desk.

"...Yeah." Adrien nodded in agreement. It was risky to be telling Nino this, where he could slip up about being Chat Noir, but at this point, Chat Noir was too tiring of a charade to keep up. He was sick of lying to Marinette, and he was sick of lying to Nino, who had his back regardless of whether he did something stupid. For a moment, he had considered just laying it all out and telling Nino his superhero alias. Nino was someone who would always stay with him, one of the only rocks that refused to be overturned by the powerful current of the river Adrien liked to call 'Agreste Luck'. Even after his father had all but banned Nino from the house, Nino still made the effort to stay by Adrien's side. He refused to even budge against the strong river, making a point that he was there and he was there to stay, no matter how many people Adrien had lost. He knew that Nino would fight tooth and nail for him. He knew that, because he would do the same for him.

Plagg wriggled in his pocket, bringing him back to reality. He sighed, knowing Plagg wouldn't like that. The Miraculous were supposed to be kept a secret. And it wouldn't be fair for Nino to know before Marinette and Ladybug.

"I've just- Do you remember Sandman?" Nino nodded his head. Who wouldn't remember Sandman? He had been one of the worst things to hit Paris since Hawkmoth first showed up.

"He created this world personally for me, he had this vendetta against me. It was torture, absolute torture. I was there for weeks. Marinette had been hurt and forgot everything, everything about me, and even after I vowed to protect, I couldn't save her in the end."

Adrien shuddered at the thought of her freezing, wet body, the way her blue eyes had grayed and glazed over as she stared up at nothing, the warmth and the stickiness of her blood. "I couldn't save her. She didn't even die in my arms- she had already been dead by the time I got to her." Adrien choked out, covering his face from his best friend.

"... And then what?" Nino wasn't sure if he wanted to know. But Adrien needed to get this off his chest because Nino knew him and he knew that he hadn't told anyone about this nightmare.

"I killed myself." Nino's brown eyes widened considerably. "I think that's what scared me most. I got so blinded that I hadn't even thought about you, or Alya. I didn't even think about my father." Adrien took a deep breath before continuing. "And when I came back from the nightmare, I was in this abyss. I was cold, so cold. I didn't know where I was, or if I was ever going to be coming back. I truly thought that I was dead. But I came back to the world, this world, and I hadn't even been gone a second."

"I did something, something I shouldn't have. Something that scared me-" And Ladybug, "I did something that I could never forgive myself for."

"What did you do, Adrien?" Adrien looked up at him with mournful green eyes.

"I vowed to myself that I would kill him." Nino watched as Adrien's jaw went taut, the blonde's teeth grinding together. It hurt to talk about this, but at the same time it was great to finally get this off his chest. He had been bottling it in for so long, refusing to talk to even Plagg. His kwami, one of his closest friends, only knew snippets of what Adrien was suffering through, and Plagg was with him basically 24/7.

"Adrien, dude..."

"I know now that I wouldn't do it. I do. But at that time, I would have. No second for hesitation. He would have been dead next to my feet if-" If Ladybug hadn't stopped me in time.

"Was it... Marinette who stopped you?" Adrien began shaking his head before he slowly came to a stop, thinking about the wide blue eyes Ladybug had as the water filled in the bathroom they were in. It had looked so much like Marinette's that time they got stuck in Alix's nightmare. Almost as if they were the same person... Pondering on that, Adrien continued on, wanting to get everything out in the open before he clammed back up again.

"I... I'm starting to think that I'm growing too attached to Marinette. I'm scared, leaving her alone for hours, and this fear is starting to distort my image of her. She's so strong and independent, and she doesn't need saving- especially not from me. I'm everything that she wants yet, I'm also everything she doesn't need." Adrien looked down at the wooden desk solemnly, his palm pressed against his chin.

"Ow!" Adrien yowled in pain as Nino slapped him upside the head. Adrien glared up at his best friend. He had just bared his heart and soul to him, and this is the treatment that he gets? Rubbing the back of his sore head, he begins to think about all the bruises he's going to suffer through tomorrow. Just because his healing was faster than normal humans, doesn't mean that bruises and cuts heal within minutes. It usually takes a few hours, almost two days for if he breaks his ribs. Adrien winced at that memory. Was a painful two days.

"Stop thinking like that. You're right. Marinette is strong, and she is independent. She also doesn't need your saving. And you're also right about needing to give her some more space and not being so physically attached to her."

"Geez, this is really cheering me up Nino-"

"I'm not done yet," Nino said, raising an eyebrow as if to challenge Adrien to speak up. Adrien stayed quiet as Nino continued. "But you're wrong when you say that you are everything that she doesn't need. You know she wants everything about you, but you can't even see all the good qualities about yourself! Sure, you wanted to kill this sardonic Sandman, and that's really scary dude, but you know you wouldn't do it. What he did to you, hell I would have done the same thing because you are my best mate, and I won't let people get away with doing that to you. But now Sandman is gone. He's not coming back. You probably scared him into staying away from trouble. And I can't take away the nightmare he made you suffer through, but I can do one thing."

"Yeah? And what is that?"

"I can remind you that you are no longer stuck in the place where Marinette died. Marinette is here, and she's real, and she's alive. She's as strong as Ladybug, and she is very capable of handling herself." Adrien watched his best friend in awe as Nino concluded his speech. Nino looked down at the blonde, holding a hand out to him.

Adrien smiled sadly, raising his hand to Nino's. They did their shake and Nino pulled him up off the chair and back into another quick hug.

"Thank you, Nino."

"Always, my man."

Phew! Got this in 5 minutes before I had to leave for work, thank God! Leave a comment on what you thought!

Also, should I continue writing these chapters to be 2,000+ words? Let me know!

Until next time, peace!