Yaoi (Boy x Boy) One Shots [[In need of editing]]

A Rough Week. (Akatsuki Fan-Fic)

Melancholy Mondai:

Deidara sat at a table in the Akatsuki base, it was Monday yet again and his beloved boyfriend was on a mission. It had been two weeks since he left. The sad blonde made his way to his room. Once the boy opened the door, his jaw dropped in shock. The one man that wasn’t supposed to be back for three more weeks sat one the blondes bed. Sasori.

“You’re back, yeah!” The blonde whispered. Sasori smiled.

“Yes, are you not happy?” The red head asked, standing to go hug his lover. 

“Of course, un!” The blonde whispered again, hugging Sasori back…

“You do not seem happy, are you okay, DeiDei-chan? What is the matter?” Sasori asked worriedly as he placed a soft kiss on the boys cheek.

“It’s Melancholy Monday, yeah.” Deidara whispered, making Sasori roll his eyes.

Twerk Tuesdai:

All of the Akatsuki, except Deidara and Konan, sat in the living room area of their new mansion, chatting and watching ESPN. Suddenly the television turned off, catching all of the men’s attention. Sasori smirked as ‘Talk Dirty’ by Jason Dearulo came on blaring through the home. The red head knew what was going to happen, he over heard Konan and Deidara plan a ‘Twerk Party’, as they called it. The pair walked down the steps that lead into the living area slowly. Both wore blue tube tops, short purple skirts with a white bunny tail attached, and red high heels. Deidara’s long blonde hair was put up in two separate pig tails that reached his hips, four red paper roses pinned in each, his bangs separated from the rest of his hair by a hair band that had red bunny ears. While Konan’s short purple hair was placed in two buns atop her head, four black paper roses in each bun and a head band with black bunny ears. Konan stalked over to the puppet master, Deidara went towards the leader, while the men just watched in amazement. The pair winked at each other before looking directly at the man in front of them. Deidara and Konan began twerking simultaneously, causing the men to blush only lightly. Ten seconds later they handed a rose to them and moved to the next man. Deidara had Zetsu and Konan had Kakuzu, ten seconds passed, another rose had vanished from their hair and another man had a his turn. Now it was Deidara with Tobi and Konan with Kisame. Another rose gone and another man blushing. Deidara made his way too Itachi, who had an odd look on his face, while Konan went two Hidan. Another rose gone, and four to go. Deidara made his way to Hidan and Konan to Itachi. Another rose gone, another  man blushing harder than before. Next was Deidara with Kisame and Konan with Tobi. Two roses left and two more men per twerker. Konan and Deidara had handed their second to last roes to Zetsu and Kakuzu. The pair turned to each other and winked, going to their original targets. Every man had a red rose and a black rose except Pein and Sasori. Simultaneously the pair handed their last paper rose away, kissed their last victim on the lips, and ran back up stairs, as the song had ended.

“Lurd Jashin, h’wat thy fock jost happened.?” Hidan asked, trying to hide himself.

“Happy Twerk Tuesday boys.” Sasori said. All of the other men, (Besides Tobi. He’s too innocent.) smiled. They understood perfectly now.

Gay Wednesdai:

“YOU KNOW WHAT DAY IT IS, UN! YO-OU KNO-OW WHA-AT DAY IT ISSS, YEAH!” Deidara yelled throughout the whole base. Normally he wouldn’t be doing that but, hey, why the hell not? Hidan walked into the room the blonde was in.

“Fur Jashin’s sake, shot thy fock op, Blundai.” Hidan grumbled. He was having a good day until the blonde one realized it was Wednesday.

“Okay but answer my question first, un. What day is it, yeah?” Deidara said with a wicked smirk. Hidan began to sweat. If he said the wrong thing the blonde would begin to shout again.

“Its,  Wednesdai, right?”  Hidan asked worriedly. Deidara’s smirk grew darker.

“NOPE, UN! IT’S GAY DAYYYYYY, YEAH!” The blonde one began to shout again. 

“GOD DAMN IT BRAT SHUT THE HELL UP!” Kakuzu walked in. He only had on a black pair of boxers. It was after all only ten am. The zombie man grabbed the Jashinist and walked back to their room after yelling at Deidara. The blonde boy began to pout. He suddenly jumped up. He didn’t care what the zombie said. It was Gay Wednesday and he was going to keep shouting for the hell of it.

Creepy Thursdai:

Deidara kept looking behind his back all day, and Hidan had caught on. He took every chance he could get to scare the hell out of the poor boy. Hidan stood around every corner and behind every door, making the blonde scream a total of eighty-two times before the boy finally went to Sasori’s room to sleep. 

Migraine Fridai:

Everything was calm and quiet. Every Friday Pein seemed to listen to one song, and he would blare it from his speakers, but today was not that day. Almost everyone had a migraine. 

Anime Saturdai:

Tobi had his spirit set on one day. Saturday. That was the day he watched anime and celebrated Japanese culture. Zetsu decided with his dark twin that they should hang out with their pet. The orange masked ninja turtle was no where to be found, the single bodied twins looked around for him. They dismissed his room, seeing as Tobi was never in there anyway. The twins looked all morning for him and when Tobi finally came out, it was around lunch time. Zetsu walked up to Tobi in the kitchen, hugging him from behind.

“Tobi-kun, where were you? Yeah, where the hell were you, brat?” The twins spoke. Tobi blushed under his mask, Zetsu didn’t know about Tobi’s Saturday habit, even though he’s been doing it for three years.

“Tobi was in Tobi’s room, Zetsu-Danna.” The orange ninja turtle turned around, hugging his lover. 

“Well Do you want to hang out- brat?” Zetsu asked.

“Tobi would love too but Tobi is busy. Can Tobi hang out with Zetsu-sama tomorrow?  And can Tobi be excused Danna?” The ninja turtle asked. Cutely. The white side sigh.

“Yes Tobi can be excused- but you are hanging out with us tomorrow.” Tobi hugged the twins and ran back to his room.

Praise Sundai:

Hidan prayed to Jashin, Kakuzu prayed to his money, Pein prayed to himself, as did Konan, Itachi prayed to the ravens, Kisame prayed to jaws, Tobi prayed to Zetsu, Zetsu  prayed to who ever, Deidara prayed to his Danna, Sasori, and the fiery red head, prayed for his sanity.  Tomorrow would be Monday and Deidara’s odd-ness would start over. Monday the blonde would mope around with Hidan, Tuesday he would twerk with Konan, Wednesday he would act spontaneous with Kisame, Thursday he would stay around Kakuzu so Hidan doesn’t try to scare him to death, Friday the boy would find a way to be around Pein, Saturday he would disappear with Tobi and Zetsu, then on Sunday the boy would do nothing but stay by his Danna’s side.