"Diary" of my 13 year old life.

My boyfriend (background story)

•Sunday. January 28, 2018

Today is Sunday and i'm planning to go see my boyfriend soon. His name is Kohl. He's a little over 5'3. Brown flippy-ish hair. Brown eyes. One pierced ear (his left). Sometimes he wears his "young and reckless" hat. He's amazing. He cares about me a lot. Which is surprising considering what we've been through. We've been through a lot. We first started dating on November 28, 2017. Then we broke up because my psycho ass went over to his house for being with another girl. May i remind you that this specific girl liked him. and she wanted to fuck him. and i was furious. a couple days before i beat his ass, she tried to get all up on him. Her name is madison. she's wanted my boyfriend for a long time. i also specifically told him i didn't want her around him. but he never listened. we broke up for a few days after that... then on january 14, we started dating again.
One day i was texting darius. he's kohl's friend and my ex (at the time me and kohl were broken up) and he was at kohl's house. i was drunk at the time and Darius said "drink me up". so i took some more of my dads pinnacle chocolate whipped vodka and walked over to kohl's house to go see darius.(it wasnt that far).  holy shit i was drunk like a mother fucker. we went into his little shack that used to be a smoke house (where you'd hang fish. i live in alaska) and i handed the bottle to darius and he chugged it. i was shocked as shit. he had juice to wash it down though because vodka is strong. kohl was next to us in the little shack. and i was minding my own business listening to everything darius said. i was just swaying around and shit too. darius whipped out a couple of cigs and we smoked them. i couldn't sit still or be quiet. then i laid down on the nasty shack floor. after a while, kohl started to touch me on my shoulder and shit and ask if i'm ok. i rejected him. then darius started touching me and i let him. i also sat on his lap while he was rubbing my clit. but he didn't put his hands inside my pants. i was also grinding on him. don't blame me, i was drunk. after a while
of sitting there, i puked. twice. kohl held my hair. darius was holding my waist because i was still sitting on him. then kohl suggested we go inside... so we did. darius helped me in while kohl grabbed my bag. it was crazy. when we got inside, i puked two
more times. (no regrets). but i felt like shit. so i just passed the fuck out while darius was behind me. and kohl was on the other side of me watching tv. me and darius were spooning. and he was still touching me. i was too tired to stop him. and then kohl went out into the living room for a while... i went to go see him. he was thinking about us, i just knew by the way he was blasting his music and sitting there with his head in his sleeve. i asked him what's wrong, he said "it doesn't matter".
EXTRA LITTLE STORY!!  ::::: before me and kohl broke up, i went over to his house and i stayed there for a little. we fucked.  then i asked him if he wanted to get back together. he said no. he said he didn't know what he wanted. he said i didn't know what i wanted. i was devastated. he also said "we don't know what love is. i don't care about anyone but myself. you don care about anyone but yourself". so i just left. that's how we really broke up i guess.
EXTRA LITTLE STORY FINISHED!!   :::::::::::::::::

k back to this story..... he said "it doesn't matter". then i said, "you don't know want you want". and all the other shit he said to me in that "extra little story". then he apologized. for everything. for what he said,  for what he did. and i hugged him. i sad "it's ok". this was 1-14-18.  the day we got back together. it was a sunday. like how it's a sunday right now.
meanwhile, darius found out we were back together and he left. deadass.
and also, another thing... when me and darius were getting all touchy, him and MADISON were dating. he left madison to get back together with me. he gave me shit for doing shit with darius while he was dating MADISON. pure bullshit. but i love him :).