Painful Scars [Jeongmo ft. Michaeng]

Chapter 24

Mina POV

My breathing felt heavy as I took my last step into the stage. I could only feel the tension and people around me. My heart started beating fiercely. My insecurity started flowing in, as I heard a few comments towards me. The trigger that made my skin feel cold, my hands starting to tremble, that made my mental health involuntarily break down, that made my pulse race with anxiety, then slow back down when I realized nothing had actually happened.

"You shouldn't lose hope, cause I believe in you"

The words I only heard from one person in this world kept repeating in my mind. I felt like she was beside me. Like she was encouraging me through this moment. I took a deep breath.

"Myoui Mina, are you ready?" I could only hear a voice calling me.

I ran my hand through my hair and stood still before interrupting the last seconds of silence.

"Yes" I answered shortly.

My heart skipped a beat as I slowly started making my first move. I tried to move with the elegance I had learned. My heart was beating along with my heavy breathing as I started spinning gracefully. If I made a single mistake, my mental breakdown was ready to attack me. My nervousness reached a high level each time I jumped. A million thoughts ran through my head as I tried concentrating on my moves. It has been years since I've been here. The old feeling of performing in front of hundreds of people was slowly reaching me. My past crossed my mind and almost made me trip. I jumped to save myself. I continued focusing on my dance while trying to ignore my childhood.

This is for you Chaeyoung.

I continued dancing trying to match my emotional moves with the music. Suddenly, memories started racing through my mind.

Even though you won't see me, I hope the feeling reaches you.

I made a high jump and landed with a split, then continuously started moving my arms like I was floating. I felt the pain that shot in my shoulder. I quickly caressed my harmful shoulder before spinning again. It's too late to give up now. I had to continue. Even if I was in pain; I can't betray Chaeyoung. Not after she did all this to me. Not after she gave me hope that made me be on this stage right now, and all I did was break her heart. My thoughts took over my dancing. My moves became faster and sharper. I swung in frustration and anxiety. My feelings took over me. I wasn't matching the music. My head started hurting. Suddenly I did, what I shouldn't have done. I stopped.

If someone stops in the middle of a performance, it means that they didn't make it. It means giving up. The only thing that filled the silence was my violent breathing. The urge to cry kept flowing through me. I could feel how much my heart was covered with bruises. I was frozen in my spot not able to move. Whispers started filling the place. It was almost over for me. I was a failure.

Working hard? Achieve your dreams? What a joke; I scoffed internally.

"Even if the road is thorn; run"

The sentence shot through me making me remember Chaeyoung again. Remembering her gave me hope again. Chaeyoung taught me not to give up. Chaeyoung taught me to keep fighting no matter what. She taught me that I shouldn't let anything get in the way. I clenched my fist. No. I can't disappoint Chaeyoung. Not at this moment.

I started dancing without hesitation. I could hear the shocked whispers from people. I ignored everything and kept dancing. I could feel my pain getting worse, but the thought of Chaeyoung made me continue. My heart started beating with strength instead of pain. I suddenly felt like I was back at the garden again. It was like I let out all my feelings in my dancing. My emotional dancing of missing someone while being guilty of their broken heart. I felt like going back in time. The old times, where Chaeyoung created beautiful memories in my life. When Chaeyoung and I met for the first time. When we went to the camping place together. When we threw dough and laughed at each other's faces. When Chaeyoung and I had fun together under the bright sky when Chaeyoung was thrown into the sea. When Chaeyoung sat beside me and showed me the drawing of me, where she told me she loved drawing things she found beautiful.

My heart suddenly ached as I swung for the last time, and landed before I bowed, finishing my performance. I managed to shed a single tear before I suddenly heard an applause. Applause from people I had never expected. It was like all my pain and anxiety suddenly disappeared. The atmosphere changed and made my damaged heart feel healed.

I lifted my head to the ceiling as if I was looking up at the sky.

"Thank you Chaeyoung"

I dressed up and went out of the competition hall. I finally took my blindfold off and I could finally see the real sky. It was already dark. The day went by so fast. I inhaled the fresh air recalling what had just happened inside.

"Congratulations Mina, you're officially the upcoming ballerina in the global ballet competition"

I was too shocked to cry. I just bowed and quickly got out of the stage. I couldn't believe what just happened, and I needed to go see Chaeyoung. Without her, I wouldn't have been there.

I went to the hospital feeling happy to go meet Chaeyoung. I asked a nurse, but she just shook her head in response. My heart shattered into pieces. No. This couldn't happen. I immediately ran out of the hospital holding back my tears. It slowly started raining as I kept running. My feelings started developing pain inside. My legs started trembling. I was soaked in rain, and my lungs started hurting. It slowly became hard to breathe. I was walking uneasily reaching the lonely place that I didn't want to reach. Misery started building inside me as I took step after step. I stopped and looked down feeling the scar that covered my heart. I stood in front of the lonely gravestone that was covered with rain. My tear reached the painful scenery.

"Chaeyoung, I made it"

~To be continued~

A/N:

I almost wrote The End.

Sorry if there are any typos and grammatical errors.

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Hope you hyungs liked it. Saranghaeyo^^