A Very KP Christmas

Day 5

Only 3 days left until Christmas. The next steps in the grand plan to save Christmas is to find Masky and Hoodie. But figuring out a method of doing so is proving hard.

"We could try to get Smile to sniff them out, like a bloodhound," Ben suggested.

Ao shook her head. "That would take too long. Smile and Grinny are still fighting, and I'm sure the only person who could get through to Smile is Jeff. Unfortunately, Jeff is still emo as hell and most likely won't return to normal unless we find Ellie."

"What about Ladon?" Ms. P asked.

Ao pondered the suggestion for a moment. "Using him might work, but we haven't seen him at all. He's missing as well, probably in the forest, doing god knows what."

Ben sighed and ran a hand through his hair. "Geez, Zalgo just had to kill Santa. To make it worse, he wants to become Santa? Ugh, that's the absolute worst...!"

"Y-Yeah, the worst," Ao murmured awkwardly remembering how she accidentally gave Zalgo the idea to be the next Santa Claus like a damned idiot.

"Speaking of Mr. Claus, were you able to find his workshop, Ms. P?" the elfin wraith asked.

"Not yet, but I'm close," she replied. "My books aren't very straightforward. Manufacturers really should stop making them so cryptic..."

"As long as you're close, that's better than nothing," Ao said. She stood up from her spot in the couch and motioned for Ben to follow her. "We'll be out, Ms. P. Call for us if you need anything."

The two left the mansion and dodged a brawling Smile and Grinny as they passed by the porch (this time they have hand grenades). Gazing out into the tree-line, the young Proxy began, "Masky said he was going to get a pine tree for the Christmas tree. Where are those around here?"

Ben pulled up a GPS on his phone and answered, "The nearest grove of pine trees is about eight miles from here."

"Eight miles. That shouldn't take Masky and Hoodie long to come back. Plus...they know this forest like the back of their hands! And their bodies. They're...extremely familiar with each other. One time I asked Masky if he had any birthmarks and Hoodie said there was one shaped like a heart exactly three inches from his butt, three centimeters in width and two centimeters in height. I...I don't know what they are to each other."

"If they haven't come back, then that must mean they either finally had enough of the bullshit that goes on in the mansion—which I can't blame them, really, I mostly do all the bullshit—or they're stuck somewhere," Ben remarked.

"Our first stop is the pine tree grove," Ao declared. "C'mon..!"

The two of them set off towards the forest together to take the hike towards the pine tree grove. They followed the GPS on Ben's phone, which began talking to him.

"Benjamin," the device said quite coldly.

The elfin wraith frowned. "Sandra."

Ao furrowed her brow. "Your GPS talks to you?"

"He used to chat with me all the time," Sandra said in a New York accent. "Isn't that right, Ben?"

"Sure...," he murmured, looking away from his phone.

"But not anymore now, huh," the GPS remarked bitterly.

"Don't do this here, Sandra."

"Hmph. I think I have the right to speak my computerized mind. Besides, how can you just use me so suddenly after all these years of not talking and expect me to be a good little GPS like you said I was??"