Bottom Namjoon Oneshots ;)))

Minjoon after concert fluff n angst

Set after Jimin teases Namjoon by running away. Yeh.

Also I'm back bitches or nyeon's but probably not for long xx

*****

It wasn't often that a concert went completely perfect, they'd miss a step, maybe get distracted by a fan sign, or playing with the confetti or just playing with each other on the bouncy castle for a little to long. And none of these instances ever bothered the leader who had to discuss changes needed if an injury took place or a manager got upset about them taking too long. Because that was his responsibility. He was the leader, he was the one they all trusted to have their backs. (He was Bang Sihyuks son).

But there was one thing that would always make him upset, and silently cry in the hotel rooms after a concert.

What was that you may ask.

That, was Jimin's countless pranks where he'd run away from him.

Maybe it wasn't such a big thing, but all it reminded him of, was his school days, where friends were slim and bullies were in larger quantities. Nobody wanted to be near the flower that attracted the bees. Not when the bees were soul sucking and murderous wasps.

So they'd run.

One moment he'd thought perhaps he had a frie-

Oh wait no...

They're gone.

And now it was happening again. But now it was his crush. His crush that would already rather hang out with any of the group rather than him. His crush that he loved with his entire being and he's not there.

No in theory it's not traumatic or upsetting but when I'm practice and after many occasions where it has happened, it hurts.

Oh god does it hurt.

It feels like his heart is being ripped from his ribs and tossed around like it matters less than a dirty tennis ball.

So here he was again, in an empty hotel room a million miles away from his umma, his home but was it ever truly his home, is it? Or is it the few people that remained by him and didn't run. Why does he feel so uneasy alone?

Why do I feel so uneasy away from you?

Where are you now?

It's 23.06 (11.06pm).

You're probably in with Tae and Kook, aren't you.

Or maybe they're busy doing their stuff.
And you're with Jin.

Maybe I would be welcomed to hang out with you all.

Maybe i wouldn't.

It doesn't matter anyway. I'm not going to walk towards you to see you turn away.

I love you and that's why I can't see that happen.

I love you and that's why I hate when you're no longer there.

I love you and I love seeing you happy.

I love you and it hurts so much.

I love you and ..

"You love who, hyung?"

"Jiminie, I love you and I almost wish I didn't.."

Wait..

That wasn't...

Suddenly a sturdy body gripped my shoulders and cried out that I was worth everything and that you love me. But you can't because you ran away. And you'll run again.

A wild animal that runs can never be tamed away from that sport again. For the rest of your life you'll run, and I'll be left in the broken pieces again. And again. And again.

As they say, history repeats itself.

And it will with you and me.

"Hyungie,

Joon,

Joonie,

Baby?

Joon, you gotta breathe for me, okay?

I'm going to hold your hand to my heart ok?

Now I need you to follow my breath, okay?

There you go!"

And slowly

Slowly,

Breath came back to him.

Oh how he missed the tiny movements made by his longs and mouth.

He was safe.

"Joon..."

A soft voice whispered from beside him.

Two arms wrapped around him.

How didn't he notice before now?

"...J-J-Jiminie?"

"Baby" the person sighed, "thank god, you scared me!"

He couldn't speak.

They had never seen him have a panic attack before.

They were never meant to.

"Never meant to what sweetheart?" Jimin questioned.

"... me... you were never meant to know... about ... you know..."

"That you feel hurt sometimes? That you feel down?" Jimin asked, "because we see it baby, we see you when you're distant, when you're sad, when you want to escape, baby we all love you, you're kookie's lifetime inspiration"

"..."

It didn't make sense.

I love you.

And you can say it so simply.

But of course Jungkook would be on your mind.

Why would I be on your mind?

I don't deserve that.

I'll never deserve that.

For I'll always be living in a wet black and white world, whilst you live in a bright and colourful world.

I'll never be enough.

"Baby, I love you. You!"

No.

Now my mind is playing tricks on me, why must I destroy myself?

"Joon... I love you with all my heart ok? Forever. It doesn't matter how loud I have to shout to have my voice reach you through this rain. I. Love. You. Till the end and onwards"

His eyes are so pretty.

Like they hold eternity.

Forever.

Just in his eyes.

I'll just lay in his arms and enjoy your company.

And maybe you're not running from me.

Maybe I just need to run to you.

🌈🌈🌈🌈🌈🌈🌈🌈🌈🌈🌈🌈🌈🌈🌈🌈🌈🌈🌈🌈🌈🌈🌈🌈

Was meant to be a smutty one shot but turned into me projecting... I mean what?!

Part 2?