White Tie, Black Leather

18: Merry Christmas, Darling

I quickly shove the contents back into the envelope and slip on my snow boots and black wool beret.

"Mother! Father! I'm heading out!" I call.

"Where to?" Mother rounds the corner and looks dumbfounded at my appearance. "Blythe, you can't go out like that, it's improper!"

"I'm not getting out anywhere," I lie. "I'm going to enjoy the sight of the snow and Christmas decorations, is all."

Father's eyes settle on me, a knowing look within them. I shift mine from his to Mother's, who appears somewhat agitated.

"Maybe you could call Daniel to take you?" Mother presses and I instantly resist.

"I would like to have some alone time," I walk past them both and toward the garage.

Neither say a word as I go, but I can feel Mother's disappointment-which I ignore.

I snatch my keys off the key hanger in the garage and slide into my car. I remotely open the garage door and slowly drive out, being careful of the ice on the ground.

I take a left and start on my way to Brooklyn, excitement and nervousness bubbling up within me.

♔

This is where the nervousness comes in.

I stand in front of Jesse's door, my hand raised to knock. I can't bring myself to, however. We haven't seen each other or even spoken since the night of the gala.

Twenty-four days- it's been twenty-four days since I've seen him.

What do I do now? Just waltz in there and pretend as if nothing happened?

No, I can't do that, but he's the only one I really want to tell about my acceptance. Not seeing him has pained me immensely, but I figured I must have done something to upset him if he hasn't called.

Or, maybe he's just done with me. Maybe he used me up and wrung me out as much as he could before he became tired of me. Tears prick my eyes at the thought but I will them away and muster up the courage to knock.

An unknown girl answers the door in just a large t-shirt, her cat-like eyes looking me up and down. I notice many other people packed into the tiny apartment, all seemingly drunk or high. "Who are you?" She hisses, her eyes turning into slits.

I refrain from asking her the same question. Is she one of Jesse's... regulars?

"I-" I begin, but Cam calls my name from inside.

"You're here!" He shoves her to the side, pulls me inside, and into a big bear-hug. "I've missed you." He gives me a sloppy kiss on the cheek and I scrunch my nose up in disgust and wipe it off.

"Is Jesse here?" I say lowly so that none of his other houseguests will hear me. I don't want to come off as a desperate girl trailing at Jesse's feet, now do I?

"Yeah," He pulls away, "he's in his room... alone."

I nod at him and begin to go, but he catches my arm, "The girl wasn't here with Jesse-she's with me, in case you were wondering."

Relief floods through me but I don't show it. "Alright," I state then hurriedly pass the crowd and venture down the small hallway until I'm standing in front of Jesse's door. There's silence coming from the inside and I almost wonder if he's asleep.

I knock lightly, but there's no answer so I bravely push open the thin wood and enter into the space. It's dimly lit by his night table lamp and he's sitting on the edge of the bed facing the bathroom-away from me.