They will not need them,
because I refuse to say something.
I keep silent and look at the two of them with a daring look,
not showing my fear of what they could do to my 'captor'.
"It is highly important you
answer these questions,
it is the only way of finding the kidnapper."
I flinch at the words he calls
my Harry. They do not deserve to know about him, no one does.
My mother lets out a sigh again,
already dissapointed with me,
I could not care less.
"You need to answer these men, sweetheart, don't you want to have the man locked up?"
This was a test.
A test.
My mother was testing me.
If I said yes on her question,
they would lock him up and
she would see how hard it was for me to say yes.
If I said no to her,
they would have their answer
on the question If I had developed the so called Stockholm Syndrome.
If I would stay silent,
it would basically be the same
as saying no to them,
or they would leave it open.
I decided to go for the last one.
"June! Answer them now."
My mother nearly shouted at me.
I laughed at them,
I laughed for the first time since he left me here.
"I am not giving any answers,"
I announced,
as if it was not clear enough already.
"We can almost assure you
she is left with issues. We have to make sure, everything is as it was before she was abducted,"
I heard one of the men saying to my mother, to which she nodded.
"But I can already tell it is not."
I looked back at the ground and I moved myself to another world,
where he and I would be together.
Dancing in his living room,
laughing and talking with
eachother in the dimmed light
given us by the moon.
He takes me in his arms
and we share the most
imcredible moments together.
With eachother we were happy
and now we are seperated and my way back to him is long gone.
"He still has your phone?"
I heard one of the officers asking me.
I looked away from them to the wall on my right.
"Yes, that's true."
I heard my mother say to them,
answering for me.
I have had enough,
I decide at that moment.
And the next thing I do leaves
everyone in the room ashtonished
except me.
Standing up from my chair,
I walk to the door that leads me out.
Calmly I open the thing and step through it, hearing the beggings of my lovely mother,
"June! Come back dear. You need to answer the questions!"
I ignore her and make my way out the building, not even running I reach my destination;
outside.
That's when I start
running as fast as I can.
My feet carry me to the park,
where I break down on a bench.
Tears stream down my face and all those people seeing me breaking down can all go to hell.
They deserve to see the pain
I carry. They deserve to see what a awful world this is. They deserve to see people being in pain.
But no one deserves to see him.
He is worthy of everything special and beautiful in this world.
My Harry, my first love and my last one. Always will he be on my mind and I will make sure no one finds him.
He is a secret,
hidden away in my broken heart.
I let out a cry and I feel myself
slowly hitting the
bottom of my sadness.
I am lost, so lost and never will I find my way back to my happy place.
Everything is cold,
the bench I am seated on,
my home here and my heart.
I clutch my hand around the necklace hanging on my chest.
So thin and made of beautiful silver the thing carries his ring.
The beautiful rose he gave me,
the ring that reminds me of the one I love.
My wet cheeks are slowly drying
and I am relieved no panic attack found its way to the surface.
But I know they will come and no one will help me as good as he did.
Without him I am just June,
a British girl;
broken and sad.
With him I was June,
a British girl;
loved and happy.
I am going to do anything to make sure no one hurts him, even if
it destroyes myself. Nobody will
hurt my Harry and put him in jail.
Constantly wondering
how he is doing now,
I imagine him in my mind the way
I remember him and want to remember him.
I let out a deep sigh
and feel my throat being sore.
My heart hurting and my heartbeat drumming loudly in my ears.
Still having the silver rose in my left hand I look up at the sky and think about what could have been and what is not.
I think of him and picture his
beautiful appearance in front of my eyes.
And when rain falls from the sky I stay put on the tiny bench.
Although the pouring drops hide
my tears, I cry and do not stop.
•/////
My heart is broken for June. I hope I have the effect on you that I want to create with writing all this. Let me know what you think. Thank you for the support some of you give. What do you think of my new cover?
