Saving Hope | Jensoo (Doctor Au)

4: Loving you, and Hating it

A/N: another warning.
•••
They don't talk about it.

They hold each other and drift half to sleep as their hands explore each other. They don't say anything and Jisoo thinks that, perhaps, that tells them more than words might ever do.

The silence feels like it's screaming at them and when their pagers start going off, she's almost glad for the excuse to escape.

They get dressed in silence, searching through piles of clothing to find their own, and check each other over to make sure they both look okay.

There's an awkward moment before they leave the room and Jennie smiles and glances down at Jisoo's lips before Jisoo reaches for the door handle.

"We should go," she whispers but Jennie's hand stops her.

She leans over and gently cups Jisoo's cheek and Jisoo can't help but smile and gasp when Jennie moves forward to gently press their lips together.

It lasts seconds but by the time that Jisoo opens her eyes, Jennie is already halfway to the stairwell.

•••

When the Chief Seokjin asks them where they've been, they both quickly lie and tell him that they were making notes to ensure their accuracy when they publish.

He's so excited about their success that he doesn't even question why they've been gone for two hours.

They share a look and Jisoo is still so wound up that she's glad when Jennie says she's going to go check on the baby.

She gives her an awkward wave and drops down in one of the chairs at the nurses' station just so that she can try and concentrate.

She's realizing that she doesn't do this sort of stuff at work purely for this reason when a figure looms over the counter in front of her. She glances up to find Lisa staring at her, holding her white coat and stethoscope.

"You left these in the scrub room," Lisa says with a knowing tone to her voice that Jisoo hates. Jisoo watches her until she wiggles her eyebrows and leaves.

It makes Jisoo laugh but still, she buries her head in her hands and curses herself for being so reckless.

•••

They kind of avoid being alone with each other until two days later when the Chief Jin tells them that he wants their first draft ready by Friday.

They meet in the usual place and when the weird oncology guy starts hitting on them again, Jennie just groans and gathers her things before dragging Jisoo to her office.

It's messy and Jisoo laughs as Jennie gathers everything together on her desk and dumps it on the empty bookshelf behind her. She falls into her big plushy desk chair and leans over to boot up her computer.

Jisoo barely looks at her for a few seconds, reclining back in her chair, before she decides that she can't take it anymore. She steps over to her and leans down to kiss her until Jennie squeaks in surprised happiness.

She pushes Jisoo back by the shoulders to put some space between them and bites her lip as Jisoo stays holding onto the arms of the chair.

"We really need to get this thing done," she whispers as Jisoo nudges their noses together.

She can already tell that Jennie is going to give in because she's already grabbing the backs of Jisoo's thighs to bring her closer.

She kisses her again, not stopping until Jennie is  trying to pull her into the chair.

"I'm not getting anything done until this is out of my system," Jisoo whispers seductively and can feel Jennie's eyes on her as she turns to lock the door and make sure the blinds are all closed.

She takes off her white coat and strips down to her bra before dropping to her knees and reaching for the waistband of Jennie's scrubs.

Brown eyes watch her silently and curiously the whole time and, when Jisoo reaches to tug Jennie's ass to the edge of the chair, she barely makes a sound.

Her breath is steady but deep.
She gasps when Jisoo's mouth lowers to her clit and they don't stop until they're both naked under Jennie's desk, covered in their white coats for warmth.

They write between orgasms. The incesntive gets their first draft to the chief by Thursday morning.

•••

They still don't talk about it but they don't stop.

Their normal night shift routine changes from questioning and staring at each other for hours to remaining naked and sated until their pagers go off.

Jisoo wishes that she could stop because it's really not professional and it's really not the reputation that she wants to have forever, but she can't.

One look at Jennie and she's bowled over, head over heels and desperate for her. She's dragged her to bathrooms and on call rooms and supply closets and there's a part of her that thinks everyone knows but she hasn't heard anything.

Jennie smiles and fucks her at work but still looks at her curious and confused like she doesn't understand what they're doing.

There's a part of Jisoo that thinks that she's just going to become a part of the ongoing story about Jennie. She's worried that she's going to become part of a rumor, that her reputation will cease to be that she's one of the leading surgeons in the world and will become that she was just another woman who had her heart broken by Jennie Kim.

And the most ridiculous thing is that Jisoo doesn't care. She's in so deep that she's waiting for the inevitable but she still can't step away.

She's supposed to be a smart woman but how can she be when she's being so reckless with her career, her reputation, her heart?

It doesn't make sense but then Jennie kisses her as she comes and holds her so tightly that it hurts, now Jisoo doesn't want it to make sense.

She just wants to stay like this.
She's completely and totally head-over-heels in love with Jennie Kim and she doesn't care that it'll end up with hurt and ruin.

She just wants to stay like this.