Speak To a Girl

Chapter 26

Tim POV: 

I sit in the room alone, taking a moment to collect my thoughts, while watching the hospital room through a window. I can see a breathing tube jammed down my throat and numerous monitors hooked up all over my body. Audrey sits sideways in a chair beside my bed, her legs hanging over the arm while she reads quietly, periodically looking over at me. 

I can't go... 

After everything I've seen, the future might have some scary obstacles, but to see how in love we are... I know she'd be fine if I don't make it, but a selfish side of me wants to experience more life by her side, regardless of the experiences that may form roadblocks for us. I walk up to the small window, remembering what I had to do last time to get back. 

I press my hand against the glass, pushing until the edges crack. The glass begins to shatter down, allowing my fingers to pass through. I feel a numbing sensation, before the white room goes dark... 

My lungs hurt, making my first breath back more than unpleasant. I try to focus on breathing before opening my eyes, but I'm too eager to see Audrey... 

I blink slowly, my eyes dry and burning. After a couple of moments, my vision begins to return, revealing Audrey sitting on the side of my hospital bed, gripping my hand. She brushes her hand through my hair, before smiling at me. 

"Good mornin'." She says with a small laugh. "How are you feeling?" She asks, although if I have a breathing tube in, I can't exactly speak. I look down to see I only have an oxygen mask on, to my surprise. 

"I'm sore." I answer, causing her to nod. She rests her hand on my jaw, gliding her thumb across my cheek. 

"You kind of expected that though." She says, looking down at her hands. I narrow my eyes at her, watching her look back at me. "What?" She questions, caught off guard by my confusion. 

"What do you mean I expected to be sore?" I ask, making her laugh, before shaking her head. 

"You told me so, right before surgery." She answers, causing me to panic a little. I look around before sitting up hastily. "Babe, easy." She says, lightly placing her hand on the right side of my chest to urge me back. 

"What surgery?" I question, sound psychotic. Her smile fades, causing her to clear her throat. 

"Baby, your heart gave out while you were loading groceries into your car at the supermarket." She informs me, taking my breath away. "They brought you here to the hospital, and you got a transplant, because defibrillators weren't going to cut it anymore." She continues, grabbing my hand and squeezing it. "You don't remember any of that?" She questions, as I shake my head, feeling a little freaked out. 

"I was in a car accident." I spit, causing her to narrow her eyes at me. 

"Tim, you haven't been in a car accident since we were teenagers." She says, making my heart sink. "You left me and Mack, you went to buy a ring, and then you went to the grocery store." She says, making things begin to clear up. How does she know I bought the ring? I look down at her hand to see it's resting securely on her finger. I stare at it, before she seems to panic. "You remember that? Buying the ring and everything?" 

"I remember buying it, and then on the way home, getting in an accident." I describe, watching her narrow her eyes again. 

"Honey, you were up and talking to me for a week after you were first hospitalized, and you knew what happened." She explains her state of disbelief. I lean back, feeling confused by it all. "Baby, you... you were completely aware... I don't understand..." She says, feeling confused herself. I try to take things one step at a time. 

"I had a heart transplant..." I voice, trying to get her to explain things bit by bit. She nods, before looking at my chest. 

"You... Mack... Uhm..." She stutters, before I realize something. 

"Where's Mack?" I ask, looking around quickly. Audrey's eyes well up, before she covers her mouth. 

"He passed a couple hours ago... He's was your donor..." She says, seeming to be engulfed with emotion suddenly. "He told you that's what he wanted, so they had you on a defibrillator until he passed, and then took you in for surgery immediately after he passed." I stare, before pulling up my hospital gown and staring at the scar on my chest. 

"How'd... Shit..." I let out, before covering my eyes. I lean my head back, feeling my chest ache. "Fuck..." I spew, kicking the footboard. 

"They had you two in the same room, and you were holding his hand as he went... You even sang to him at one point... You made him feel at peace... He went exactly how he wanted to, when he wanted to, for the reasons he wanted to." She reassures me running her fingers through my hair again as tears slip down my cheeks. "He was so set on giving you his heart, that he pushed on it even when you didn't want it. He told you that giving you the future would be an honor... and that..." She stops to laugh through her tears. "and that he wasn't going to be using it much after he was gone." She laughs, sniffling, before gripping my hand again. 

The doctor walks in, seeming a little sheepish. I stare at him, desperate for answers. 

"How are you doin'?" He asks, standing at the foot of my bed. 

"I don't remember anything that happened..." I spit out, watching him cringe. The doctor looks at Audrey, before taking a deep breath. 

"In surgery, your body initially didn't accept the heart." He slowly breaks, causing Audrey to stare at him in disbelief. She's apparently hearing this for the first time. "You essentially had no heartbeat for thirty-eight minutes." He informs us, causing Audrey to fall winded. "Some damage to your memory is expected, with what occurred."

"You told me everything went perfectly." Audrey breaks out. I squeeze her hand, while tears begin to roll down her cheeks. 

"He's recovering perfectly. Complications like these occur pretty often with transplants. It's a dangerous procedure, and it doesn't always work the way it should." He says, causing her anger to grow. 

"Audrey, I'm okay." I reassure her, watching her catch her own breath. She nods quickly, gripping my hand slightly.