I Need You #Wattys2014

Chapter 28: I Need You

"You take all the time you need, man. Khia i'm sure will respect you for that. I don't know what was said between you two but it really scarred her." 

"I feel bad for that, and i'm sorry for taking your gun. I was lost for a minute your my brother Mikey and I love you man." 

"I love you too but, touch my gun again and i'll kill you myself.' We both started laughing. 

Pulling up to the gate Freddie Lean into the car and we shook hands, After he got out of the hospital i paid all his bill and told him i would pay him a monthly salary if he wanted to retire, but like any hard working man, he wants to earn his money. 

"It's good to see you again young man. You looking good." 

"Same to you Freddie, it's been a long three months but i'm ready to get back work." We chatted some more and than drove up the long drive to the front of the house. I took a deep breath remembering all the good and bad things that have happened here. I love this house but it's time for a change. 

"You coming in?" I asked Mikey

"I'll be back i gotta pick Jen up from work." 

I shook my head and walked inside, i could smell the cleanser in the air, Mikey had the house cleaned for me. The smell of food was also still fresh in the air, Ms Tyonna had made me a meal, they all had taking care of me but i still felt alone. Walking in my room i tossed my bag on the bed and sat on the edge holding my head in my hands, this house was made for a family and right now mines was broken.

"Shh go back to sleep." I lifted my head and looked around the room but, i was alone.

"It's ok close your eyes." I heard the voice again and got off the bed. Looking at the bedside table i saw the baby monitor and it was turned on. Walking down the hall i opened the door and saw heaven, NaKhia was sitting in the rocking chair holding a bright eyed  Mariah. I didn't know what to feel, i was scared, nervous and happy all at the same time. 

We were silent at first just starring at each other, everyday in rehab I thought about what I would say when I saw Khia again, and now that she's here my mind is blank.

"Hi Messiah." She stood up from the rocker and layed Mariah down in her crib. 

I couldn't say anything, nobody told me she was here, she was home waiting for me. We stood still starring at each other, I wanted to rush over and hold her, but i was scared what if she wasn't here for that. 

"You look real good Siah." She walked closer, closing the gap between us. She smiled at me and my heart stopped, after all these years she still has that effect on me. 

"What are you doing here Khia?" Her smile faded and i felt bad for asking, but i wasn't mentally ready to see her or the twins. 

"I-um, the last time I failed you when you needed me the most, i couldn't let you down again." 

"I'm ok Khia really, you didn't need to fly the twins all the way out here to just check on me." She was concerned and i appreciated it. 

"I've been living here for over two months, i came but you were already checked into rehab when i arrived, I really wanted to see you Siah. 

"Maybe that was for the best, i was in a dark place that day." I shook my head trying not to remember how i felt the moment i pulled the trigger and nothing happened. Looking at Khia now i know that would have killed her too. Why was we doing this to each other? Everything about this moment was not right, Khia was only here out of guilt. I had told myself that i needed more time to get myself together before we talked again, I need more time.