bookworm // wolfstar au

t h r e e

"hi, sirius," remus' voice says brightly. it's far too early in the morning for such brightness, and sirius just manages a tired groan before he turns his head. when he realizes it's remus, he sits upright so quickly he knocks over james' mug of coffee.

"hey!" james whines, glaring at sirius as peter waves his wand to clean it up.

"hi, remus," sirius says back, genuinely not even aware of james or peter or anyone else sitting at the gryffindor table. "um, uh..." he actually has to swallow hard and force himself to focus. remus is reaching across the table for the maple syrup, not using his wand despite the fact that his arms are slightly too short to reach. smiling a little, sirius reaches over and grabs it for him.

"thank you," remus mumbles, cheeks flushing.

"you could've just used your wand, you know," peter says, mouth full of food. sirius glares at him, and he silently goes back to his plate of scrambled eggs and toast.

"i know," remus responds after a second, his cheeks even redder now. "i...i try not to use magic for really simple things. i know how dumb it sounds." he doesn't expand more, but sirius doesn't like the self-conscious look on his face. he wants to kiss his face to make him smile, and just as he thinks that james kicks him under the table. he looks up, and james mouths, 'you're staring.'

"so, um, did you get a good grade on your herbology essay?"

remus brightens. "yes! thank you sooo much!" remus loops his arms around sirius' neck and hugs him close for a second, and sirius can literally feel remus' smile against his cheek. his heart starts to beep double time, and joy creeps up his chest to his throat.

"oh, it's no problem, really," sirius stammers, flustered. when remus lets him go, sirius wants nothing more than to pull the tiny, sweet boy back into his lap and cuddle him until the end of time.

"i gotta make it up to you," remus says, worried now. the concern creates the sweetest little crinkle between his eyebrows, and sirius puts his thumb out and gently smooths the crinkle out. 

"don't worry about it," sirius says, much more gently. his hand is still touching remus' face, and when he realizes that, he pulls back. "sorry," he adds.

remus' face is even more flushed if possible. "i'm..." he actually covers his face with his hands. "i'm gonna make it up to you. let me," he says, voice much firmer now. it's still adorable and tiny and gentle, and sirius can't help but smile a little.

"sure, okay, remus. if you really want to." sirius is biting his tongue to the point of bleeding to keep from kissing the poor guy. sirius can hear james saying something to him, but literally all he can do is stare at the tiny, shy smile on remus' face. 

- - -

"you're so gay," james says when they finally get back to the dorm later that night. 

"i mean, yeah, but what makes you say so?" sirius asks, pulling back the comforter on his bed. he's beyond tired and can't wait to sleep.

"your face when you were looking at remus. you looked like you wanted to fucking marry him," james laughs as he crawls into bed.

"i'd marry him so hard," sirius admits, smiling.

"that's gay," james laughs, throwing a pillow at him.

"james, you're pan, and peter's gaysexual. we're all gay," sirius laughs, throwing the pillow back.

"did you just say gaysexual?" peter laughs, getting into his own bed.

"gay asexual. gaysexual," sirius grins, and peter rolls his eyes, grinning. "i really would marry remus, though. so damn hard."

"we know," james huffs, but he's smiling, too. it's rare for sirius to catch feelings for anyone, since he claims relationships are gross and unnecessary. clearly, remus has changed those feelings for him.

- - -

"what are you doing?" 

remus recognizes alice's voice without even turning around, and he doesn't turn from what he's doing to answer her. he squints down at the recipe book, chewing on his lower lip. "how did you find me?" he asks.

"i was sitting in the common room when you left. you didn't even see me," she answers. she inches closer to peer over his shoulder, and her eyebrows shoot up. "are you...baking?"

"i'm trying to make chocolate chip cupcakes," he admits. "without magic."

"why?" he shrugs, but he's blushing, and alice rolls her eyes. "are you doing this for sirius fucking black?"

"...maybe," remus replies shyly.

"remus --"

"no, alice, i don't want any shit for this, okay? he...he's really nice, and he really helped me out with my herbology essay. i wanna make it up to him somehow! he hasn't been mean, not at all, and i don't think the rumors are true. so...if you have something mean to say about him i don't wanna hear it!" he says this last bit in a rush, anger makes his cheeks flush red. alice looks surprise at the outburst, but doesn't say anything about it, just silently starts to help him finish the cupcake batter.