africa ☾ h.s.

SIX

The day after the mean man and Kate's rude interruption of the lovers' love story, Susan and Harry acted differently. They were more reserved and quiet; not inasmuch ignoring each other but, most definitely, more held back.

They were scared.

And I would be, too. They only had two days left. Two days and then Harry would go back to his Where We Are tou-ah and Susan would go back to her little town in Canada. And they wouldn't ever see each other again.

Would they?

Niall explained this to me as we finished painting the school. "The mean man's name is Simon. He's sort of like our dad, in a way. He wants to protect Harry from falling in love again."

"Because of Taylor?"

"Yeah, because of Taylor," Niall muttered underneath his breath. "Harry got really hurt from Taylor."

"What did she do?"

Niall was silent for a bit, grunting as he lifted the paint bucket over a few feet. I followed with the paintbrush. "She was just... bitter. After Harry left her she said and did some things that hurt him. A lot."

"And Simon thinks Susan will do those things, too?"

Niall nodded, allowing himself a small smile. "I suppose so. But Susan's different. She's good for Harry. I know she is."

"Taylor wasn't good for Harry?"

"She was. In the beginning. I suppose every relationship has a purpose. Taylor's was to break Harry; Susan's is to build him back up."

"But when Susan and Harry leave.... when they part ways.... won't that break Harry even more?"

Niall gave me a look that seemed heartbreakingly true. He said nothing for a minute, before saying softly, "Can you grab that cloth there?"

I knew what the answer was.

--

I am filled with things and I battle feelings
I have never wanted to exist inside of me
I lack too much confidence and I carry too
much sadness and my body is full of stars
that never learned their name. I wear my 
insecurities like pockets and I fill them
with my fears and my hands are growing tired
from reaching down into them to hold the
feeling of being afraid. I am afraid. Always
afraid. Afraid like chimes when the wind lips
are sealed. Afraid like your eyes when the stars
fall asleep in the black. Afraid like dreams
when they realise they are just dreams and that
reality is that one scar that will never
fade away.

I am, terrified. Terrified that the things
inside me are the things that will keep me
from ever finding a home inside someone
else. 

But she makes the fear subside; she makes
my demons hide and she makes the sun
seem brighter than anything else in the
whole world. She is cotton candy and
blue skies and a cool breeze flowing
through a summer pasture. She is 
everything to me, yet at the same 
time she is nothing because I will
never have her.

- harry e. styles

I found Harry's journal lying underneath the tree that afternoon. The page was open to the above excerpt.

He loved Susan.

She loved him.

and i have heard it said that in the military
they do more than the average day person
does in the space of an hour. but if i am able
to wake up in your arms every day for the rest
of my life; laugh with you and cry with you in
your darkest hours, then i will have done so
much more than anyone could ever do in
a simple hour; and i will have killed no one
in the process. for love is not so much about
what gets done or how one should go about
doing it. love is about taking the leap, severing
the line. plunging into darkness before anyone
can tell you not to. why? because you're waiting
for me at the bottom.

- susan a. perry

--

i wrote some of Harry's diary and all of Susan's. ( :D ). some of Harry's is Christopher Pointdexter's. :)

also, should Africa be 10 chapters long? or just 9 with an epilogue?