The King's Lover

Chapter 10

           

Kusy could tell that Juliet was tense the next day when she went up to her room. She kept running her fingers through her hair and tapping her foot. Kusy told her that the Tates weren't going until that night, but it didn't change the queen's mood.

     After the servant delivered her morning medicine, she vanished into the washroom again. She returned after a few minutes and started pacing, her face pale. 

     Kusy was sitting on the arm of the couch again, her eyes on the queen. When Juliet completed her eight turn of the room, Kusy straightened.

     "What is he like?"
    Juliet stopped and raised a brow. "What?"

     "Your Ryder," Kusy said. "What is he like?"

     "He...he's smart," Juliet replied uncertainly. "And brave—why?"

     "I know how you feel," Kusy said, gesturing at her. "Like you cannot do anything to help. I am trying to distract you, so tell me, what is he like?"

     Juliet sat down in the center of the room, glancing at the shut door of the closet where she slept. The pile of books next to it teetered precariously, but Juliet didn't seem concerned. "He listened," she started quietly. "When no one else did, he listened to me, even when I was completely raving, and then he'd explain carefully what was real and what was in my head." She paused and swallowed. "He saw me, when no one else did."

     "You love him." It wasn't quite a question.

     Juliet's voice was quite but strong. "Yes."

     "Why did he guard you, when no one else did?"

     Clearing her throat, Juliet turned back to face Kusy. "There was a fire," she said. "I got trapped, and Clarisse ordered him to stay with the group. But he ran back inside and pulled me out, and Clarisse told him that as punishment for defying her he'd get to guard me full time. I told him that I could get him restationed, since I knew he didn't want to guard me, but when time was up, he told me..." She smiled wistfully. "He told me that he didn't want to be restationed, that he was fine right where he was.

     "And on the days when the glass castle choked me, he'd take me down to the library and sit while I read for hours and hours and hours. When that wasn't enough, he convinced Clarisse to let us go to Cremea, where I met Valin and Taryd. I hadn't left Amidia until then, and I just—I just realized that the whole world was out there."

     "He asked about you," Kusy said when Juliet paused. "When I saw him, all he wanted to know about was you."

     Juliet looked down, clenching her fists in the carpet. "I hate that I cause him so much worry. I hate that I can't tell what's real, that as soon as he was gone, I succumbed to the darkness again." She shook her head. "I'm stronger than that—I have to be, and yet..."

     Kusy slid off of the couch to sit on the floor in front of Juliet. "It is not your fault," she said simply. "You cannot help what your mind makes up; it is just part of who you are."

     Juliet looked up to Kusy. "I'm really glad you're here, Kusy. I don't know what I would have done without you."

     Reaching over, Kusy took Juliet's hand in hers and squeezed once. "I believe you would have found a way, with or without me. I just helped speed things along."

     Juliet gave her a grateful smile, and the women were silent for a few moments.

     Then Kusy broke the silence. "When you take back your throne, will your court support you?"

     "I'm not sure," Juliet replied truthfully. "Ryder and I spoke to most of them on my birthday, and a good portion of them seemed to be on our side—well, a good portion seemed unhappy with Clarisse. But now, I'm not sure what they'll say, after these past few weeks."

     "We can convince them," Kusy decided. "You will need support from your court when you take your throne back."

     Juliet leaned back on her hands, working her lower lip through her teeth. "I don't want Clarisse to know any more than she has to, so I don't want the court to know much. I think it will be enough just to talk to them, show them I'm not crazy. And you need to show them you aren't that hostile," she added as an afterthought, looking Kusy up and down. "You tend to glare at people."

     "I do that on purpose."

     "I see." Grinning, Juliet got to her feet. "Hey, if we go now, we can be in one of the sitting rooms before the ladies arrive."

     Kusy followed her to the door reluctantly. "And why would we want to do that?"

     "I hate it when I walk in a room and everyone falls silent," the queen told her. "And then they start whispering, peeking at me from behind their hair as if I can't see them. If I'm there first, they're the ones who are awkward. They have to figure out how to politely leave, because they don't want to be in the same room as me. But before they can do that, I get to cut in and invite them to stay, and that is when we engage in pointed conversation that proves we're both fairly normal."

     Juliet slid down a stair banister, loose brown curls that had escaped her ponytail fluttering as she landed with a light thump. Kusy opted to skip every other step and meet the queen a few seconds after she'd landed. 

     "It's right over here," Juliet said, nodding her head at a door that lead to a sitting room. "Not too many ladies use this one, which is good. I want to start small."

     Juliet opened the door and slipped inside, Kusy on her heels. The queen was right, it was empty. They each took a chair on the opposite side of the room, near the windows so they could see out onto the palace grounds. Kusy realized, by looking at the arrangement of shrubbery, that they were just above Ryder's cell. Several floors above, but still. She hoped that Valin and Taryd would be successful.

     She glanced at Juliet, who was also looking out the window with a slight smile on her face. But her knuckles were white, and there were tight lines around her eyes. She must have been using the excursion as a way to distract them, to think about something different for a while.

     The door opened and they both turned instinctively. A young Lady who Kusy dimly recognized took a few steps in before stopping, making the maid behind her almost run into her.

     The lady's cheeks turned pink. "Your Majesty, Your Highness." She dropped into an almost-curtsy, holding the dress out to her side slightly and bending her knees the barest bit. "I didn't realize this room was occupied. I'll leave you to it."

     "Don't bother," Juliet said, crossing one leg over the other and waving the lady in. "Please, join us."