Char and Posey's lives have taken them to opposite sides of the country, against their will of loving each other. He's all she wants, but he's a flyer. Posey wants to stay put while Char's one to be on the run. Char misses Posey more than life itsel...
"char? what are you doing?" I heard my mother's voice from behind my blessed step father that i was just about to punch in the face.
"oh hey, mom," i said not making eye contact with her. she knew that i didn't like jason, and she knew that he was one of the reasons that i moved out when i did. he didn't like the way i was acting and what i was doing when i wasn't at home and he made my mother kick me out of the house without anything but the clothes on my back.
"what are you doing here, char?" she kept saying my name like she hadn't seen me in years and couldn't believe her eyes. it had been just over three and a half years since they kicked me out, just before i started college at princeton. they had no idea about posey or anything that had been going on in princeton. i doubt they even knew that i was in princeton or going to college at all. they didn't care.
"actually," i said starting to realize that they hadn't checked up on me once since i left; not one phone call or anything. "i left princeton, where i live now, and i left my girlfriend and everything about my new life in college to come punch this psycho in the face. but, oh yeah, that's right! you wouldn't know because you haven't even cared enough to pick up the phone and call your youngest kid and see what's happening. not even on holidays, do you know how much that hurts, mom?"
"char, do not call your father a psycho," she started to say.
"oh heck no, this piece of crap isn't my father. he's the only that kicked me out and left me for nothing."
"CHAR," she said becoming angry. "do not talk about your father like that, garrett is here and you need to set a good example for him."
"oh, this kid?" i said pointing to where garrett was hiding around the corner. "I was never a good example for him when i lived here, so what makes you think that i would become one now after not seeing him for almost four years of my life?"
"this is unnecessary, char," my mother said trying to control her anger.
"so you're blaming this on me? you're right, it is my fault. it's my fault that i chose to go to college and better myself to get away from you people that considered me less than nothing. It's my fault that i went broke for weeks on end, without eating, or asking anyone i could find for money just so that i could get a meal. oh, and it's totally my fault that my parents, the one's that are supposed to provide for me and be there when i need something, threw me out on my butt and expected me to do everything myself! that one is definitely my bad, right?"
elizabeth, my mother, was now crying. i knew i was blaming them for everything, but who else was to blame? i didn't choose to be thrown out of my own house at the age of 18. there wasn't anything done for me, i had nothing.
"so you're in college now?" jason asked.
"yeah," i said running my hand through my hair. "third year, i'm almost done now."
"what are you going for?" he asked while my mother was trying to clean herself up.
"engineering."
"that's awesome, bud. you'll do great with that."
i was shocked that jason was actually having a conversation with me. and i wasn't quite sure what to say to him. my mother was just over bawling her eyes out and garrett was around the corner of the doorway, eavesdropping.
"i left my girlfriend," i said too quiet for anyone to understand what i said.
"what was that?" my mother asked sniffling.
"i left my girlfriend, posey. she's the best thing that has ever happened to me and i left her all alone, why did i do this?" i asked rhetorically, not expecting an answer.
"who's posey?"
"my girlfriend, i told you that."
"where is she?"
"she's in princeton, oh gosh, i hope she's still in princeton. oh gosh, i need to call her. what if something happened to her? oh gosh, oh gosh, oh gosh." i started freaking out, not knowing what posey was feeling. i needed to check up on her, but my phone was dead. "do you have a phone i can borrow?"
"of course, char," my mother said. "come on in." i walked through the front door that shut behind me. everything was moving in slow motion and i didn't know where i was at.
char. you are in boston. you are okay. you need to check on posey. she is okay, you just need to check in. you messed up and you need to tell her that.
my thoughts were consuming me and before i had realized it, i was sitting in a chair in what must have been the living room. this house had changed so much since i had been in it, or i just didn't recognize any of it because it had been so long. my mother came back in the room and handed me a phone that looked like a landline that i didn't know we had either.
"take your time, we'll be in the kitchen if you need anything," she said and left me in the room by myself. what was i going to say to p? what could i say that would fix what i had done? there was something that went wrong and i lashed out at her. i never meant to lash out at her, she was my soul mate and i needed her to survive. she was the only person that i truly cared about anymore. i needed to fix what i had just put her through. i needed to do it soon before she made a horrible decision.
i dialed the number i had memorized years ago; no answer. maybe she's just upset and doesn't have her phone with her. i dialed again and it went to voicemail.
where was she? why wasn't she picking up?
i never really considered that she would be upset with me, until now. what if she was angry with me and didn't want to hear what i had to say to her? what if she was purposely letting my calls go to voicemail? but for whatever reason i didn't think that that was the reason she wasn't picking up.
what if she had hurt herself? what if she thought i was done with her and there was no reason to continue? what if she had gotten hurt? what if jake had found her apartment?
she had to pick up.
i dialed her number again and was going to leave a message if she didn't answer this time. the phone rang and rang and then clicked over to voicemail.
"p?" i said into the speaker. "i'm sorry. i messed up and never should have yelled at you like that. what's going on? why aren't you picking up? baby, tell me what's going on. please, i will do whatever it takes to fix this, just call me back when you get this. remember, you're a champ, you'll always be my champ."
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this is probably one of my favorite scenes! what do you think?
