Remembering Yesterday (Camren)

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Rain.

When Camila thinks of rain she is reminded of Lauren and her smile that made her feel warm and her eyes that twinkled like they were made of stars. The thought of Lauren makes her hands feel numb and her heart thump erratically.

Camila writes this all down so that one day when she goes back to reread it, she can try and feel what herself feels now. So that her future self can be reminded that at one point in time she met a girl who made her feel like she could fly.

Reading back what she wrote, Camila bites her lip. Her memory of Lauren is still fresh in her mind –after all, it only happened two hours ago –but she’ll forget soon, just like always. Camila doesn’t want to forget (she never does but this is one of those times where she feels like to forget would be akin to something like murder). Impulsively, Camila picks up the important journal and flips it open to the newest page. She writes hurriedly.

You met a beautiful girl in the rain today. Her name is Lauren.

--
When Camila sees her, she stops. She can’t seem to figure out why her knees feel like they’re going to give out or why her heart beats wildly in her chest as she sees this girl watering flowers in front of a small shop, but for whatever reason she goes immobile.

“Oh, it’s you!” the girl exclaims after noticing the frozen girl. “Hi, Camila!”

Camila doesn’t think she’s ever met this girl before, but she doesn’t exactly trust her memory anymore so she’s probably wrong.

“Remember me? Lauren? We met yesterday while it was raining.”

Oh. She’s the Lauren from her journal.

“Hello,” Camila says, voice small and breath shaky.

She doesn’t understand why her body reacts the way it does, but this girl – Lauren – is special, and while she may not be able to recall exactly why, she can feel it. And she knows that she wouldn’t have put her in her important journal if she wasn’t.

“Going somewhere?” Lauren asks with a tilt of her head.

Adorable.

“Work.”

Camila hopes she doesn’t come off as rude. She’s never been good with socializing, even before when she was normal. She doubts her circumstances now would change that.

“Oh, where do you work?”

Camila digs her nails into her palm and tightens her hold on the strap of her bag. She doesn’t like questions especially when she can’t be sure that she’s answering them accurately.

“Bookstore. It’s down the street.”

Lauren’s face lights with the kind of genuine joy Camila didn’t think existed. She’s always been a bit of a realist (a realist, not a pessimist –Dinah’s never believed there was a difference).

“That’s really cool!” Lauren says like working in a bookstore is the most exciting job. It really isn’t though considering books have been on the decline ever since e-readers became a thing. “I’ve always loved books, but I don’t have much time for that anymore, you know?”

Camila nods. She doesn’t actually know. She used to love reading too, but she doesn’t see much point in reading one now when she won’t even be able to remember what it’s about after a few hours.

“Well, I’ll let you go. I’ve got to get back to work too.” Lauren nods to the humble flower shop behind her. Camila’s probably passed it many times on the way to work, but it still feels like she’s looking at it for the first time.