You Hold My Heart

Don't Say You Miss Me

Lauren's heart was hammering inside her chest, adrenaline coursing through her veins as she stepped off the stage and into the dimly lit corridor that led towards the dressing room. The other 3 girls were walking slightly ahead of her, all of them in a daze. After all, performing at the VMAs had been a dream they'd all had at some point, and knowing they'd just achieved that dream felt absolutely incredible.

Normani, Ally and Dinah entered the dressing room, but for some reason Lauren paused. She wasn't sure why she'd stopped and she was even more unsure as to why she chose that moment to turn around. It was as though something was pulling her in that direction.

Her smile swiftly slipped as she was faced with the one person she really hadn't expected, or wanted, to see. Her breath hitched in her throat.

Dinah said she wasn't going to be here. She can't be here right now.

"Hello, Lauren."

Perhaps this was all a dream. After all, performing at the VMAs was a pretty dream worthy topic. Maybe she was asleep right now and all of this was just happening in her head.

Then she looked down at the floor and saw the droplets of water that were gathering around her feet due to the explosive end of their performance.

It was all too real to be a dream.

"Hello, Camila," she was impressed she even managed to say those two words because right now she didn't really trust herself to say much at all.

The younger girl walked towards her and Lauren hated that all she could think about was how beautiful she still looked. She didn't need her mind to go there. Not now. Not again.

Camila was exuding confidence as she smiled, her voice low and altogether too appealing for Lauren's liking, "I hope the girl playing me didn't hurt herself when she leapt from that stage."

Lauren swallowed, hoping that her words wouldn't get stuck in her throat. Not that she was sure what those words should be. She didn't even want to be speaking to Camila. Not after everything that had happened. She glanced away before speaking, running a hand through her wet hair, almost no emotion evident in her voice, "There was a mat."

Camila laughed awkwardly, "Well, I'd already figured that out for myself. After all, no ambulances have shown up. It's a good job it wasn't really me up there. We both know I would have managed to injure myself somehow during that sequence."

"What do you want?" Lauren hadn't intended her words to sound so blunt, but, now that they were out there, she was sort of glad she had.

A flash of hurt reflected back at Lauren as she glanced into Camila's eyes. As soon as her gaze settled there, Lauren looked away again. She'd almost forgotten what it felt like to look into those eyes.

Almost.

Her stomach was swirling uncontrollably and her brain felt as though it was doing the same.

"I'm sorry," Camila said, her voice quiet and desperate, a stark contrast to the confident and daring voice that had echoed between them just moments ago, "I just wanted to congratulate you. You were absolutely incredible on that stage."

Lauren let out a deep exhale, not knowing at all what to do next. She hadn't seen Camila for months. They couldn't just pretend it was all alright. Not after everything that happened between them.

The silence seemed to fill every space around them. It was suffocating.

Lauren wished she'd never turned around. If only she'd just followed the other girls and hadn't hesitated. For a moment, she contemplated just walking away.