Bleeding Hearts

CHAPTER 1

Ashley’s POV

Empty...

That’s how I was feeling right now.

That’s how I always felt.

Over the years.

I sighed and stared into space emptily. I just zoned out on everything or ran down memory lane against my consent.

It was not in my control anymore. I didn’t try to control it anymore. I just decided to go with the flow and see where things took me.

Where life planned on taking me.

Over the years, I got used to it.

There were no greys. There was no white.

It was all black for me and I was completely fine with it.

After all, I gave up on my life five years ago in that accident.

That night!

It annihilated my entire family.

It changed me, emotionally and spiritually.

I was not the girl I used to be.

At some point, I screamed and wished for everything to go back to normal but as my nightmares screamed back at me every night over and again, I submitted to its will and fell silent.

“Are you okay?” I looked to my right. It was Serene, my classmate. “You don’t look good.” She frowned at my silence.

Serene was slim-figured and fair-skinned. Her hair was black and her eyes were green. She looked like a doll but I knew of her potential to kill.

“We are going to the canteen. You want to come?” She asked me hopefully.

“Serene!” She was called by her so-called friends. “Let’s just go.”

“You should leave,” I closed my laptop and packed my bag. I stood up to leave and faced her stoically.

Serene kept looking at me but when I showed no signs to reciprocate in any form, she heaved a defeated sigh and left silently.

“You brought it upon yourself when you chose to believe that arsehole over me, Serene,” I whispered to myself and walked out of the studio as well.

“Unfortunate for you but I don’t forget things so easily.”

Some things could never be changed back once they were destroyed, no matter how much one wished for them to be restored.

That’s what I learned from life. That was what life was.

A horrible ugly bitch that followed ‘give and take’.

But it always took more than it gave.

“Nothing changed,” I whispered while walking towards the parking lot. “Nothing will change.”

I shook my head when I felt my thoughts going down the same darkness that I took years to come out from. I was not going to give in to that pessimism again.

Not for me but for the sake of my mother and my siblings.

“Ashley?” I stopped and looked back with a frown.

“What?” I asked when Serene stopped in front of me.

“I am tired of all this,” Serene said exasperatedly. “I know what happened was not right–”

“What about it?” I cut her sharply. “You still believe that bastard and not me.” I scoffed. “Spare me the guilt trip, okay?”

I walked away from her angrily.