To Make You Smile

To Cherish And To Remember

Chapter 10
To Cherish And To Remember

"She... kissed me... yesterday..." I mumbled, rolling around in my bed and burying my head under the fluffy pillows. I kept rolling around and tried to remove it off my head. I didn't notice I was at the edge, so I fell butt-first on the floor. "Ow..." I muttered. A knock broke the silence. I stood up and opened the door. It was Dad. "Hey Dad. New chores again?"
He shook his head and gave me a smile I only see when there's something good to talk about. "It's good news, Louis!"
"Yeah, I know. Your smile practically gave it away."
He dragged me out of the cozy and messy coconut shell also known as my room and pushed me down onto the chair inside his office. "Since you kept asking about Alisa's recovery, I found out yesterday that her cancer cells are not multiplying anymore!" he said excitedly, waving the examination papers in my face. Sometimes my dad acts like he's younger than me. "A few more chemotherapies and she'll be purged of the illness that kept her secluded for ten years! Imagine how she'll feel about that!"
I sighed. "Dad, you're a doctor. You know that a 'few more' chemotherapies can kill her immune system. The loss of that means another threat to her."
The smile drained a little from his face. "But a doctor knows how to restore that bit by bit! Haha! I got 'ya!"
I crossed my arms in defeat. "Fine. How long would that take? You told me that each time she undergoes chemotherapy, she's not allowed to leave or paint or even draw for one week."
He sighed. "I don't know. But I guess we'll just have to keep this up and wait for the clock to stop counting down to her death, okay?"
I nodded and left the office. Even if I was greeted with that kind of news, I still couldn"t take the image of Alisa kissing me yesterday. I dressed into casual clothes and headed for the hospital. When I knocked, she didn't answer. All I heard was bad coughing and throat-clearing sounds. All the other rooms emanated coughing, too. I pushed the door open and found her off the bed, kneeling on the floor and coughing. I rushed to her side and soothed her by rubbing her back. "Hey, Alisa, are you okay?" I asked worriedly.
She nodded, but she was still coughing. It only stopped when blood came out of her mouth. I took my handkerchief and wiped her lips clean, then assisted her to the bathroom. She coughed again and again that I felt my own throat constrict whenever I hear her. She cleared her throat, washed her face and turned to me. Her eyes were reddish, and had circles of eyebags around them. I took some water from the pitcher on the desk and gave it to her. After she finished drinking, she looked up at me. "I'm sorry, if I caused trouble."
Her voice was raspy and unclear. "It's okay. Go get some rest." I tucked her in the bed and called my dad. "Um, Alisa's coughing blood, and her eyes are reddish. The other patients in the other rooms were coughing, too. I'm not sure if it's blood they're coughing out, but still."
There was a short pause. "Can you take care of the others for me?"
Take care of corpses. No. I will not take care of- ah, fine! "S-sure..." I slid my phone back into my pocket. "Uh, Alisa? Dad asked me to look at the other patients. Can you take care of yourself now?"
She nodded. I sighed and went out the room. I checked the others and luckily, they weren't coughing blood. It looked like Alisa was the one who took the strongest blow. I returned to her room and found Dad taking a sample of her saliva. "The others were just coughing," I reported. Dad slid the sample into the pocket of his lab coat. "I think it's just a common virus. Since your immune system and most of your internal body parts like your throat aren't that strong anymore, the mere action of air moving speedily through and the raspy sound you make in your larynx impaled your throat, thus causing it to bleed. I suggest you refrain from eating sweet or bristly food."
"Like an urchin?" she asked. Dad waved this away with a chuckle. "No, like... lettuce. If you don't chew it properly, the bristles will irritate your throat and cause you to cough. If that can't be avoided, you should just chew it until you think it's mushy enough. Less singing, less talking. No hard laughter and shouting. That's all." He turned and gave me a pat on the shoulder, saying, "How was it like for you to deal with the others?"
"Feels like I'm dealing with zombies."
He sighed. "I'm not gonna let you take up medicine in college. You're too picky." He chuckled and left the room.
"Heard that? He said less talking. You always talk."
"See these?" she asked in a teasingly mocking way, gesturing to her eyebags. "I spent half of the night practicing how to talk without hurting myself."
"Fine, argument valid. But no crepes for you. They're sweet, so they're not allowed. Ice cream, too."
"Aww, no fun..." she whined. Then she smiled at me. "Something tells me that you've been bothered by the fact that I almost kissed you."
My eyes widened. "You're going to bring that up now?!"
She chuckled lightly. "See? You're getting worked up about it."
My mouth closed nervously. She kept on giggling about how I reacted and gave me mocking looks. I finally spoke and said, "Fine. I was so bent on thinking about it because you almost stole my first kiss."
"I thought first kisses belong to our parents." I looked at her in surprise. "I know. Well, first kiss from a girl, then."
"Oh... I thought girls are the only ones who make a big deal out of that. Why are you making a big deal out of it?"
I gulped. "It's... it's because... uh..."
She giggled again. "Fine. Since you can't answer, let's just leave it at that. I think it's something to cherish, though. Something to cherish and to remember."
"I don't need to remember. It's been stuck in my mind for a while now."
"Will you remember me?" she asked, her tone full of sadness. This was something I've never heard in her voice before. "You know, if I die. I know I'm almost free of cancer but look at how frail I've become. I want to know if there's at least one person around who will remember me."
I looked at how pale she was, and how thin she'd become. "I won't just remember you," I answered, patting her head and stroking her hair. "I'll remember you and I'll miss you at the same time. I thought life's too short to be negative. Life's too short to frown like that, too," I reminded her, pulling her cheeks. I smiled faintly in her direction. She removed my hands off of her face gently and grinned at me. "Okay!" We talked for a while and I thought about losing her. I don't want to let go of her just like that. I don't know if it's me or my feelings talking, but I know to myself that I love her. Love made me want to hold onto something that will probably disappear in time. I don't believe in hope, but I will believe if it involves her survival. I want her to stay, and I want her to be by my side. I don't care if she grows weak and frail, I don't care if she loses her hair or becomes anemic because of chemotherapy, I don't care if her looks change. I just don't want her to go.