is it really?

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my life is worth this?
you define me,
my worth,
and this is what you think?

i am worth the extra gas money,
the time spent hoping i dont off myself,
the energy lost convincing me all this,
the loss of breaths,
the hurt you cause yourself,
the money spent on meds?

meds that don't help,
because i seem happy,
they must work,
how else could i seem happy?
I'm not happy,
you won't believe me if i am happy.

Why would i be?
I'm not aloud to be,
and that's not just me saying it,
you believe it,
don't you?

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