How To Love (Editing)

Audition

"It's because of what we feel way down deep inside."

I hit the last note of the song and close my eyes, letting my voice ring out.

There's a polite applause from everyone who's watching. I've come to realize that it's not because I'm not good, it's because they're afraid to offend me. To be honest, I could get pretty violent at times, but don't judge me.

I beam confidently, something I learnt in middle school drama class, and get off the stage. I catch Penelope gesturing towards me while talking to Ms Miller. Oh yes. I'm so getting the role.

To my slight surprise, Bianca greets me at the bottom of the staircase.

How the hell did she get out of her seat without getting into trouble? But, oh well, it's not like no one knows she's a teacher's pet. 

She narrows her eyes at me and grabs my arm in a vice-like grip, digging her nails into my bare skin.  "Listen here and listen well, you bitch. Just because you have people applauding doesn't mean you're the best. I'm the best and you know that. That role is mine." she hisses.

I blink innocently at her. "Are you the director?"

"What? No -"

"Then I guess you don't get to decide," I shrug out of her grip. "Are you telling me this because you're intimidated by my super acting skills?"  

"Like I care." she snorts. "Maybe that's why you lost the role of Eden to me back then."

How could she bring up that without feeling any remorse? Does she even have a heart?

"Fuck off," Sadly, even with her five-inch stilettos I'm still taller than her, and I stare down at her with my best glare. 

I stomp back to my seat and Katie looks at me questioninly.

"Nothing." I snap.

She knows better than to reply when I talk to her that way.

I focus on all the other people auditioning. Kathleen, who's trying out for the role of Faery Queen, isn't bad. In fact, she's pretty good. I've never noticed that before.

After Kathleen, a few boys in my class went up to audition for the Beast. Out of the course of me eye, Bianca is leaning forward in her seat, her gaze fixed avidly to the stage. She's checking them out blatantly. It's as if she already knows she's landed the role of Beauty and she wants to make sure her co-star or whoever it is unlucky enough to work with her is hot or extremely cute.

How shallow. How pathetic.

And you're just jealous, a small voice whisper in my head. I push it away.

Pfft. Jealous. As if! At least I've got a better sense of modesty than she does, and that skintight short red dress she's wearing at the moment is proof. Plus, it's just her daddy's money that makes her popular, because she constantly organizes parties for everyone. As you might have guessed, I was never on the list. It's not like people like her for her. 

You're just in denial.

That conscience or whatever it's called is an annoying force I'm going to have to deal with soon. What does it know anyways? It's irritating.

But frank.

I scowl at the back of the girl sitting in front of me. Oh, stop it! Jealous? In denial? Who does it take me for? When was the last time I actually felt jealous of someone? Oh, that's right, two years ago before my life suddenly took a devastating turn for the worse.