Forever Your Fan (On Hold)

CHAPTER 2: He said yes

We're here at the school kitchen, baking. All the staff went home because it's already late.

This should be easy, and I want it to be longer so I could spend more time with him. He's intently shaping the chiffon cake to his liking, and I'm mixing the ingredients. Each time I start a conversation, his anwers comprise only of "yes," "no," "okay."

He finally gives up and says "Less talk, more work."

Wow! my little brother's buzz lightyear robot is friendlier and knows more words than him. It says "Buzz lightyear at your service" and "To infinity and beyond!"

"Do you hate me so much that you don't even talk to me?" I break the defeaning silence. It's a rhetorical question. I don't expect him to answer but happy when he says, "I don't hate you."

"I know you're forced to do this. I'm sorry for that and for the other day." He doesn't answer, it's not like I'm expecting him to say "It's okay, I forgive you." He's not that kind of person.

"I like it. I mean I used to do this a lot but not anymore."

"Oh, you don't look like the baker kind of guy." I say smiling. Now we're talking.

"No I do it with my mom. After she left. I don't do it. Not anymore."

"Work abroad?"

He pause for a minute probably debating in his mind whether to tell me or not.

"It's not like that. She left me and my father. She left without saying goodbye. For... For another man."

"ahh... So that's why you're like that."

"I'm like what?"

"You.. clearly hate women, that's why you don't want to socialize or get close to your fans that much. You think all girls are the same."

"No that's where you're wrong, I don't like them because their so nosy, loud, and obnoxious. You're the the walking definition of that." He says irritably.

"Geez. Thanks friend. I appreciate that compliment."

"But seriously, I'm really sorry about that" I added. "I know how it feels, having someone special to you go away. My dad died when I was little. One minute he's healthy, playing and laughing with me and the next thing I know, he's gone. It felt like my whole life shattered. The thing is.. we never really know, and sometimes we just have to always be ready." I stop talking because I can feel my tears are welling up. Everytime I remember this, my sadness always comes back. I used to cry a lot. I just stopped because I don't want to let that single moment define me. I try to blur that period in my life so I can pretend I'm still whole, that nothing's ever broken me.

"Yeah,I know." He taps my shoulder and looks at me differently. I don't know what he meant by that but it feels good.

"Come on, let's work. We didn't came here to talk to Dr. Phil." He says smiling now. I know behind that smile is concern, understanding, and a good heart. I smile back, glad to know this side of him.

"So does it mean we're friends now?" I say out of the blue right after that serious conversation. Shameless, I know. I know. I'm always the girl with an ulterior motive.

"I think we're finished. We should put this in a box." He's already at the door when he says, "And my answer is no, we're not."

We walk home together so we can show the "PROOF" according to him.

I hate that he has to emphasize that word as if the cake is some kind of forensic evidence and what we did was purely business. And I hate that we're walking just to give this to the boys who are having the best time of their lives at some bar. I've been wanting to ask him about his own car but decided otherwise. I figure a snide remark will only be thrown at me.