“That new girl, the rich bitch. She’s one of them.” Her voice was scornful, but he could hear the jealousy underneath.

Could taste it in his own mouth.

Them. The VirtuMax kids. They’d started showing up this summer, with their money and grav-cars and g-boards. Their privilege and arrogance. He pulled his battered brown coat tighter around his shoulders. He wanted nothing to do with them.

Marny took another gulp of her drink, then wadded up her napkin. “Are you done yet? Come on.” She grabbed her tray and stood.

“Where?” He looked down at his half-eaten lunch. It would be better if he finished it, since breakfast had been scarce and dinner was never a guarantee, but the grey meat and congealed white sauce was too unappealing. He pushed the tray away.

“The library. I have to see about graphics mods.”

“I guess.” He dumped his lunch and followed Marny out of the cafeteria.

The library smelled good. The scent of old paper filled up his nostrils, though there were fewer books every year. He went past the meager shelves and straight to the netscreens. Maybe he could find more info on the new simulators VirtuMax was working on.

The corporation had shouldered into town, but he could almost forgive them. After all, they were one of the few companies working on a full-sim.

Full sensory simulation. Total immersion in the virtual world.

His nerves tingled at the thought. What if that world—the world of pixels and programming—could feel as real as this one? Sometimes when he was simming he almost felt it, like he was there, inside the game. But the feeling never lasted. It was impossible to completely escape his reality.

He leaned back in his chair, one leg propped out in front of him. Maybe the people who said there couldn’t ever be a perfect interface were right, that the tech couldn’t ever get to the level of complexity that matched a human brain.

VirtuMax had been developing their full-sim for years, but the release was always delayed. Tam skimmed the articles, but he’d read all of them. The most recent one was a couple weeks old, about how the lead game developer’s death had brought the project to a stop.

Marny paused beside his screen, her taped-together reader glowing in her hand. “Anything interesting?”

“No. What are you looking up?”

She cocked a shoulder. “3-D meshes. I can’t get my avatar fat enough in Freelife. I don’t want to look like somebody’s idea of the perfect woman. I want to look like me.”

“Good luck with that. I hear Freelife’s a hard world to modify.”

“That’s why I chose it. Have you seen the avs in there?” She gave a snort of disgust. “If you saw someone who looked like that in RL, you’d think they were a genetically mutated freak. All legs and skinny and boobular.”

He hadn’t really noticed. In fact, he’d always been fine with the standard avatars in virtual reality. The females were usually cute and sexy. The guys were handsome and brawny, or fearsomely monstrous and warlike.

The point was, he didn’t want to be himself. All the options from there were good with him. Marny wanted to make a statement. She wanted to bust the parameters wide open. Him? He just wanted out.

“How’s your system?” she asked. “Still having issues?”

He shrugged. “It’s ok. I mean, it works. I can play, there’s just a weird thing with the imaging.”

And the sound card was going, and sometimes he lost connection altogether, but he didn’t want to say it out loud, in case it completely jinxed his system.

“That’s the problem with over-clocked gear.” Marny shook her head. “You’d think it would last more than a year, huh. My Uncle Zeg might have some spare parts around. Or you could go back to playing at his simcafe.”

Back to the rental-quality systems. The thought left a sour taste in his mouth. For years he’d helped around the cafe in exchange for system time. Marny’s uncle didn’t mind the extra help—or the way people would come in to watch Tam play, after he got good.

Good enough that he won last year’s tri-state simming tournament. He’d scored his system out of it—plus a chance to compete at nationals. And he could have won there, too, if only…

His heart twisted at the memory and he yanked himself back to the present—away from the poisonous thoughts of what might have been.

“Ok,” he said to Marny. “If your uncle has some parts, that could work. I might end up needing them.”

He didn’t even want to think about his system failing. The best part of his day was when he could pull on the helmet, slip on the gloves, and go slay some monsters. Be a hero for a little while, someplace where he was the best.

“Why don’t you ask him,” Marny said, direct as usual.

“Alright then, I will.”

Maybe Zeg had something worth scavenging. Tam’s little brother could figure out how to wire it in—the only thing the Bug was really good at. His blood-stabilizing meds made the kid so manic he couldn’t concentrate on anything unless it was full of fire or electricity.

Tam shook his head and went back to reading. There were no solutions.

Sometimes he was pretty sure his life was on its way to being permanently broken.

*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

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