Kill.

One.

The Day of the Attack

I stare at my hands, dried with her blood. They're shaking from the cold air. I look up and breathe towards the night sky, seeing my breath trail away. The sound of sirens wail in the distance. I bury my face into my hands then run my fingers through my messy hair. Why did I hurt her?

* * * * *

Earlier That Day

"Daddy! Daddy! Thirty more minutes please?" Sammy asks.

I lower my eyebrows and give her an odd look. I smile and quickly pick her up to rest over my shoulder.

"Not today, pumpkin!" I tell her.

She begins to playfully hit my back, giggling, "Put me down!"

I bring Sammy to the car, which I left parked in front of the park. I fumble to unlock the door while carrying Sammy. Soon after the short struggle, I buckle her into the the booster seat. I then enter the car, slide the key into the ignition, and bring it to life. "Ready to see mommy?" I ask, looking back to find Sammy pretending to be asleep. "I'll take that as a yes."

I don't believe I planned much for myself today. I'm taking the weekly visit to the bar right after dropping Sammy off. I don't see the bar as an escape from reality to drown myself in misery. It's more of a leisurely thing and I'll always see it that way. When I began going to the bar about a year ago, I remember Lauren's worry of me feeling depressed. Although life isn't the best, I simply enjoy the idea of heading there to have a chat. To me, I prefer the atmosphere more than the drinking itself.

I finally reach the corner around my house. I pull up into the driveway and find Lauren waiting on the porch for Sammy. I look back and tell Sammy that we're home. She opens her eyes, quickly leaves the car, and runs to Lauren's arms. Lauren already knows that I am going to the bar. I mouth to her, "I love you." I pull out from the driveway and begin making my way there. Tom's is not a long drive from my place.