French Teacher

Chapter 35

What was happening to us? Puberty?

"I can't tell you." He finally spoke. "Not yet."

Frustration got the best of me. Remember? I was an impatient bastard.

I took his shirt collar by the fist, shaking. "Tell me. Now."

He shook his head.

"Lloyd. You have to tell me. Please. I--" I trailed off, trying to salvage anymore dignity I had left. "Want things to be normal again."

He shook his head again. "I don't think that's possible, Pey."

The words tortured my heart. "I just...don't understand anymore."

I let go of his shirt, turned the other way and cupped my hand against my forehead.

What was happening to us?

This was getting way out of hand. This was all so happening so quickly. This was getting heavier by the minute. Everything's changing so fast and I just can't keep up. Am I losing my best friend?

The thought sickened my stomach. I couldn't digest the possibility. This affected me so deeply that it made me unable to look at Lloyd. I hate what had happened to us.

Lloyd grabbed me by the shoulder and urged me to turn back at him. It only took me a second before I eventually gave in, hoping he had changed his mind and tell me what's really wrong this time.

Our eyes found each other again and all I could do now was wait.

"Penny." He said. "I need you to focus. Just...please."

His voice was pleading. And I couldn't help but wanting to slap him in the face and just cut the shit out. I couldn't understand why he couldn't just tell me. He was just making this a lot more confusing than it already is.

Then suddenly...

He loves you...

A thought flashed.

I blinked. My heart stopped. Then my body froze for solid five seconds. It was painful. It felt like my body was being wrapped by a thick vesture of in denial. What I was feeling was so indescribable. My brain struggled to handle this havoc of a situation.

I panicked, I felt scared of what would become once this assumption turned into a fact. And what came out of this was pure denial. My brain scrubbed the impossible thought away. In my head, I was gasping for air, trying to calm down; trying to convince myself that this was no where near the case.

Fifteen seconds had passed, and I'm guessing this must have been too long for Lloyd to consider a positive outcome. He let go of my shoulder and took a step backward.

"I got to go." He said, voice tracing with hurt. He didn't look at me this time, but I saw how he struggled to stop the shakiness of his lips. My eyes were wide, not even knowing what was in my system anymore. Everything just turned pale and confusing.

I didn't even stop him from walking pass me. The only indication I got that the night was over was the sound of his front door being closed. Not hard, not too quick, but just any other sound of a normal door close.

*****

Author's Note

It's been so long since I last uploaded. And I'm really sorry for that. College had been really busy and emotionally exhausting. Recently I've been having emotional problems, most particularly anxiety. Sucks. But although this chapter was so short, I still hope you liked it. I'm starting to get annoyed with Penny's denseness 😢 But that's just how I see how she'll react. Penny had never been exposed by a confirmed admiration from anyone or even being slightly aware of any concept of romance. So being liked by someone, or to even being attractive to anyone, was never a possibility for her to consider. BUT DON'T WORRY! I know she still has a lot of development to go through! And I hope you'll stay tone to see it! From now on I'll try to update as much as can, maybe once a week? No promises though, but I'll do my best!

Love, Z