The Trials and Tribulations of Me

Chapter Four

"I know, I just can't right now." I walked up to her and got in her face making her look at me.

"The next time I see you or my parents you had better told them about Jordan missing in action or I will tell them myself." She nodded nervous and I backed off. I went back into the living room and got my stuff and left. I didn't even say anything to my mom because I didn't feel like hearing her bullshit any more today. This family was a handful.

By the time I got home I felt drained of everything. I dropped my things on the floor and took off my shoes and collapsed on the couch. I just wanted to sleep the day away. However my stomach growled so I got up and went into the kitchen and got a bowl of strawberries and came back to my spot. I pulled my legs up into myself trying to get comfortable. Once I was satisfied I found myself looking at the wall trying to collect my thoughts.

I looked over at the picture of Jordan and I felt myself fall into pieces. I missed him. I didn't know where he was or if he was still alive. I remembered the time we went to the beach for the first time and he got stung by a jelly fish. We ended up having to find a cave so that I could pee on his foot which we looked up and found was the only way to stop the pain. We promised each other to never talk about it but I let it slip to dad and he teased him ever since.

I wanted more times like that with my brother. I needed my brother to be alive, not for his sake but for mine as well. Without him I would lose my mind. He was the only family other than my dad that knew me better than anyone. Sure I had Lucas but I needed my brother too.

"Looks like you have a lot on your mind," a voice said making me look up. I smiled when I saw Lucas standing there with his hands in his pockets smiling at me. He knew when to show up and when I needed him the most.

"You're home early."

"I was able to wrap up the deal in Beijing a day early." He came over to me and sat down next to me bringing me into him as he wrapped his arm around me. I sighed in contempt that I wasn't alone anymore. I hated not being able to see him every day and now that he was back I felt complete. He kissed me on my forehead making me feel all warm inside.

"I'm glad you're home."

"What were you thinking about before I came in?" I looked at him taking in his face. He had let his facial hair grow a little and I couldn't decide if I liked it or not.

"I went to my parents' house to meet my mother thinking it was about Jordan missing in action but instead it was about my mom trying to plan our wedding." He laughed out loud like I had said something funny. "What's so funny?"

"What's funny is your mother planning a wedding for us and we are already married." I smiled and shrugged.

"Trust me I know." I snuggled deeper into him trying to get his scent all over me. His body just had a way to make my body heat up and I loved it. It was quiet for a moment while we both thought about our own separate thing.

"Do you want a wedding," he finally asked breaking our silence. I scrunched up my face confused at his question.

"What?" I looked at him trying to see if he was serious or not. We had never talked about having a wedding so I didn't know why we were starting now.

"Do you want a wedding?"

"Why, do you want one or something?" he shook his head.

"I want whatever you want and if you want a wedding then I will give you one."

"I never wanted a wedding, I just wanted to be married to you." I reached up and kissed him on the lips. He smiled holding me in place a little longer. Sometimes he knew just the thing to do to make me forget about my troubles.

I woke up in the middle of the night feeling pain all over. I could barely move and I felt weird. When I tried to sit up and I screamed in agony. I held my stomach not knowing what was wrong. Lucas jumped up looking at me panicked. "What's wrong?" I looked at him.

"I don't know. I have pain in my stomach and I can barely move." He jumped up and pulled the covers back and I watched as his eyes went wide. "What?!"

"There is blood everywhere under you!" I looked around me now scared out of my mind. He quickly got dressed and then picked me up to take me to the hospital.

When we got to the hospital I was rushed into a room so they could stop the bleeding and make sure I was okay. The whole time I was on auto mode, I couldn't think or know what was going on. When everything checked out the doctor came in.

"What's going on," Lucas asked holding my hand and shaking. I could tell he was just as shocked as I was. He was trying to be strong but he was failing and only I could see it.

"I don't know but first I want to check on the baby and then we will work from there." She started the ultrasound where the baby popped up and then she tried to find the heartbeat. My eyes stayed glued to the baby inside me on the monitor as I pleaded for everything to be okay. Things went quiet as the doctor kept moving the instrument around on my stomach trying to find a heartbeat.

"What's the problem?"

The doctor stopped what she was doing and looked at us, "I can't find a heartbeat."