200 Pounds of Love

Chapter Six - Brent's Mom Is "Mom-zilla"

“Sorry, buddy. We exaggerated.” I apologized for the two of us. Knowing Alex, would probably have an ‘epileptic tongue’ to pronounce those words. “But seriously, what did you do to make her so mad?” I asked seriously, looking at his shaven head, which now looked like recently pruned grass.

The chuckle I tried so hard to contain escaped, making a weird sound. My hand quickly covered my mouth, but it was too late. Brent’s eyes were now focused on me through his glasses.

That just made me want to laugh even more.

“C’mon! We´re your friends. Who else are you gonna tell?” Alex encouraged, leaning forward on top of her desk, hovering over Brent’s personal space.

From the side, I noticed Brent’s shoulder jerk as he felt Alex’s presence. His face turned sideways, and for a second, he and Alex were inches away from kissing noses. He shifted slightly, but it ended as soon as it happened.

He looked at both and finally sighed in surrender.

 “It was stupid. I mean it’s not as serious as a terrorist attack. I was on my computer for a change.” He explained sarcastically, leaning to rest his forearms on his legs. It was like watching an AA meeting confession. “I got this e-mail from my AH friend with the most awesome program I have ever seen.”

Despite Brent´s nerdy aura, he was actually more than what meets the eye. AH were initials for Anonymous Hackers, a kind of cyber group that loved to play pranks on the web. Ever since they met, Brent´s stressful life had gotten better. Ask how many times Patrick’s Facebook page and Twitter account had been hacked, featuring girlish comments in his status like ‘I can´t believe I never noticed how good my hands looked like with a little bit of nail polish! Now, I’m a big fan of it! Can’t wait to try it again!’ That one was the most memorable—excluding cute puppy photos and Barbie-inspired rainbow images everywhere, of course.

It was his own way of retribution; it was his own way of standing up against the bullying, and I supported it a thousand percent.

“I opened the file, not knowing how heavy it was, and you can imagine what happened when the entire house was left without light. It got worse when our neighbors also complained about it.” He bent his head between his legs and shook it while his intertwined hands rested on the back of his neck.

 “What?! You made the entire neighborhood go black?” Alex jumped on her feet, eyes wide-open in astonishment.

“Not the entire neighborhood—just my house and two others!”

“Like that should be considered less serious?” I added, amused by the story.

Again we could hear a faint sigh coming out of his mouth. “The program must have fried my hard drive and from there it went to all electricity connection in the house and the others.”

I would have paid my entire year’s savings to see the scary Mrs. Bell, with a candle in the darkness casting shadows on her face while searching for Brent to kill him.

“And how did she know it was you? It could have been anyone, for all you know.”

Alex and Brent looked at me with disbelief planted all over their faces.

“Rob, sweetie pie, name a single person—apart from Brent— you know who has done something even the tiniest bit similar to this.” She waited for me to reply. The truth is, that no one came to my mind. My dear friend was the only person reckless enough to do something as astoundingly amazing as this. It reminded me of the time he changed everyone’s Internet password. “You can’t, right? That is how Misses. Bell knew he was the culprit. A simple process of elimination.” Alex explained, acting like Sherlock Holmes. She was only missing her Watson and her pipe.

“And she decided to cut your hair as punishment?” I asked raising my eyebrow.

That woman was beyond strange. She was bizarre.

“Yep.” He nodded, looking puzzled as well by his mom’s choice of penalty. “She thinks by doing this, she’s completed some kind of exorcism ritual, and now I’ll be free from my past demons.”

I repeat. B I Z A R R E.

“Well, I take my hat off to you.” Bending her whole body in a theatrical gesture, she took off an invisible hat from her head.  “That was major stupid but, at the same time, super awesome. Not anyone can shut down—by mistake, of course—the electricity service of three freakin houses. In fact, I can picture your mom’s face searching for her son, she being possessed by the spirit of Edward Scissorhands, ready to take action.”

 We burst into laughter, unable to stop the tears from our eyes. A few moments later, our English teacher, Ms. Rowley, entered the classroom. We had to swallow the persistent laughter.

Classes passed like usual. By the time I lifted my gaze from the book, lessons were over. Each one of us had a favorite subject: Alex had Social Studies; I had English; and Brent had—whatever hacker system thing that Brent did in the Computer Lab.

We grabbed our bags and were about to leave when Ms. Rowley asked me to stay for just a couple of minutes.

“Robin, can I please talk to you?” Her glasses slipped down the bridge of her nose. She pushed it back with a finger while waiting for me to obey her mandatory request.

Alex and Brent gazed at me, wondering what strange situation I was now involved in. They left with traces of concern on their eyebrows. I knew I would be interrogated after.