Storm 》Clifford A.U

026;

         "Блядь" I mumble, finding myself waking up naked and in Michael's arms for the hundredth time. "Fuck" I say again, sitting up and pressing my hands into my face. I really needed to stop doing this, I really needed to stop allowing myself to get lost in him. It wasn't healthy, and it certainly wasn't doing anything to help me find my sister.

I reach for my phone tiredly and quickly press on Luke's contact name, eager to talk to him. After a few rings he answers, voice groggy and the slightest bit annoyed.

  "Lina, do you have any idea what time it is?"

     "I'm sorry, Luke. But everything's a mess and I just keep on making it worse." I whisper, looking down at Michael who was still sleeping soundly beside me.

     "What did you do?" This time he sounds more awake, more alert even. It scares me the slightest bit because the last thing I wanted right now was a lecture. I just wanted to talk to my best friend.

      "How's my mom doing?"

     "I don't think you called me in the middle of the night to talk about your mom." Luke sighs, and I can hear him on the other end, shifting around. My heart pangs because I miss him. I miss being minutes away from my best friend and being able to talk to him about anything and everything whenever I wanted. And I missed my parents because honestly, they weren't the same anymore and I don't know if they ever would be. Above all else, I missed my sister. I missed her so much that it physically hurt me.  I couldn't think about her without crying. I couldn't think about her without feeling like I was already too late. "But, she's okay. I mean, as okay as she can be. I visited her yesterday night and brought over some food. She's not really eating much." He whispers the last part and I bite my lip, pulling Michael's blanket closer to my chest.

     "I don't know what to do, Luke."

      "I wish I knew what to do to help you out, Lina. I'm so sorry." He sounded so sincere and if anything, that only made me feel worse. All anyone wanted to do was help me, but no one actually could. 

     "I fucked him again," I blurt out, part of me wanting Luke to be angry at me just so that some sense of normalcy could be returned to my life. I didn't want the lecture, but, maybe I needed it to help me get my shit together. "Like, I know I told you about the first time but it's happened a lot. Several times. And I can't seem to stop."

      "Jesus, Alina. Is that what you went up there for-"

     "No, Luke. You know I came up here for." I growl, standing up and crossing the room to get a change of clothes. It was the middle of the night but I wasn't really tired. I didn't really feel like sleeping anymore.

      "What good is getting caught up with Michael going to do for you?"

      "Obviously none, I get that, okay? I just wanted the distraction and if there's one thing he's good at, it's distracting me." I turn to look at Michael, who is breathing softly. His hand reaches out the slightest bit, almost like he's looking for me. Right now, he looked so vulnerable, so sweet, so easy to talk to. Those are the parts of Michael that I liked. Those are the parts of him that make him seem less scary, less guarded. But he barely let those parts show. "I just wanted to talk to you for a bit but I have to get out here. I'm feeling a bit trapped and useless."

      "What are you going to get done in the middle of the night?"

      "I'll let you know when I figure it out. Sorry for waking you." I say softly, hanging up and tossing my phone aside without waiting for a reply. 

      "So, are you planning on walking around campus in the middle of the night asking anyone if they knew your sister thought she was pregnant?" Michael mutters, and I jump, startled.