A Sister's Place

Chapter 28

Chapter 28

There was something being poured on Jamey, and her nose told her it wasn’t water.  She opened her eyes to see John standing over her releasing a stream of urine.  He was aiming at her mouth, but the urine was going up her nose, causing her to strangle.  In response to the strangling sensation, she sat up suddenly, ignoring the pain shooting through her chest and down to her lower back.  John’s laughter filled the small space.  She could now see with a light from a corner at her side. 

“Did you think I wouldn’t find you?  You silly bitch!  It wasn’t even hard!  Now you have to be punished so you’ll remember next time instead of ignoring my promises,” John said as he bent over close to her face.  She could smell cigarettes, beer and sweat.  His eyes had the crazy look she recognized from other serious beatings.  She knew she had broken a serious rule.  Her life didn’t flash before her eyes, but she knew that her death was probably inevitable. 

He grabbed her by the hair and snatched her head back so she was looking directly into his eyes.  This was the moment when she was supposed to beg and cry, but somehow, something felt different.  Call it pride, but she refused to die begging for her life.  She stared back at him and saw a sudden movement on her left side, followed by warm liquid running down her side. 

“I must be cut,” she thought, and yet she continued to stare into his eyes.  Strange.  First the movement, then the blood and now the pain.  The pain was sharp and pulling.  “You may take my life, but karma is going to be a real bitch when she comes to collect for all you’ve done to me,” Jamie said to him as she smiled and felt the darkness close in again.

Jamey’s spirit was at war with her body and mind, wanting to escape to peace and freedom.  Why continue in this pain, cold and misery?  Her body wanted time to recover.  He had beaten her many times before.  Hurt her before, but her body had always rebounded.  A couple of days of Extra Strength Tylenol, hot showers alternated with soaking in tubs of hot water containing Epson salts and bath oils.  During the healing days, he was always quiet, speaking softly, bringing orders of Chinese hot and sour soup and large glasses of lemonade.  He would sleep on the couch near the door and spend the days asking if she needed anything.  Her body would quickly respond to the rest, quietness in the house, and a queen-size bed all alone.

Her mind needed time to think things out.  Time to determine the reason she had to hold on and to create a special prayer.  She remembered listening to her grandmother praying and taking her to church as a child.  She knew she needed to pray using specific scriptures to cover her situation.  Finally, believe as never before, because this time her life truly depended on her faith.  She knew Ms Jefferson and Grace would be looking for her.  They knew how far she had come and she would not just walk away without any contact.  Someone would call her job and her housing counselor.  The pieces would not add up and they wouldn’t let up in their search for her.  Still, peace and freedom was not a bad idea……

Sensing weakness and uncertainty in Jamie’s body and mind, her spirit prepared to make a hasty exit. Jamie, in a weak and raspy voice, began to pray, “Father, I need You.  Your word said in time of trouble I could run to You and find shelter under Your wing.  I need that shelter now.  I need the protection that only You can give me.  You are help for the helpless and strength for the weak.  Well, Lord, I am both helpless and weak.  I don’t understand all that is going on now.  My body is hurt and my faith and hope are fading fast.  I know if I give up now, I am going to die, but I don’t believe this is the end You planned for my life.  I was on a better path and I would like to complete that journey.  Lord, please send strength to my body, peace and hope to my mind, and someone to rescue me in this cold, hard place.  Amen.” 

As the prayer ended, Jamie began to feel a new peace and a different kind of quietness.  “Maybe I waited too long,” she thought.  “Maybe this is what death feels like.”