A Road Trip to Remember (Katniss and Peeta Story Sequel)

Chapter Thirty: I'm Sorry

The funeral seemed to last forever, everyone in the town showed up. Not many people stayed near the casket for more than 20 seconds though, And I dont blame them. Who wants to stare at the body of a 16 year old girl who turned the grey sky clear. Whose eyes used to light up the room, but would forever stay closed. You would think with 4 days to cry I wouldn't be able to anymore, but God must had given me enough tears to last for a life time because they don't stop. To my left is Uncle Haymitch, actually dressed nicely for once in his life. I stand next to my mom, who cries into Plutarch's shirt. She isn't as bad now as when we first told her though. If I were to say she was heartbroken that would be an understatement. She literally fell to the ground and began to scream, tears flying everyone and her hands over her ears, trying to stop reality. She refuse to stand up for at least two hours, and even though she only moved to the chair on the living room, her hands covering her face while Plutarch tried to comfort her. He stayed strong for the most part but I knew, hearing him a few times, when he thought he was alone he would cry over Prim. I can't blame him, he proved that he loved her and that he wanted to be a father to her. But he only had a short time. Uncle Haymitch was drunk when I told him, but somehow he still understood what I was telling him because it was the first time I had ever seen him cry. Ever since I told him the driver was drunk, I haven't seen him take another drink of spirits. My friends, same as everyone else. Tears will probably stain our carpet forever. I think telling Rue was the worse. She was Prim's best friend, they did everything together. I watched as she realized the only thing she had left of Prim were their memories. I asked Gale to tell Rory, I knew I couldn't look him in the eye and tell him that the girl he obviously liked, possibly loved, was dead and wasn't coming back. Gale won't talk much about his reaction but since I've been with Gale everyday, I know that Rory's door stays shut. He did make it here today though. Gale and I have been hunting lately to get my mind off of things, and I really wish it would work. We talk a lot more now, usually about something other than cars or alcohol. But somehow everything reminds me of her. Everything beautiful comes to mind when I think of her, the flowers in the meadow that grow near my old house. Speaking of that, Cinna has made his way to the front of the line and is hugging me. He is very supportive during this time.

"Hey Katniss." He says. "How are you doing?"

"How I should be I guess. Crying every time something reminds me of her."

"I'm going to tell you this and I'm not sure if it will help you or not. But I once talked to someone who lost his son in a house fire. This was roughly 8 months afterwards and he said to me that it was like living with an amputation. You'll heal over time, and you'll get on with things, but you will never be the same. So you will be like this for awhile, but it will get better. I promise." He says and I know he is trying his best, but nothing anybody says right now will effect me, but I wouldn't tell him.

"Thank you Cinna. It does help." I lie but fake a smile. He then moves Onto my mother and Plutarch. A lot of people come to me, hugs are given and tears spilled, the encouraging words that things get better are said to much because they lose their meaning. Every single person in this line will forget about Prim in a few months, move on to something else to think about, while I'm stuck with remorse. I should have said something to her when she began to wake at the gas station. I shouldn't have let us end on a bad note, she didn't even know how I felt about the whole situation and she never will. More people come, they look at Prim, and then they continue. Throughout the entire day I would say close to 1,500 people came through. 5 people I won't forget. I had texted him, telling him that Prim was involved in a car wreck but I wasn't ready to admit to myself she was gone. Somehow he found out, probably through Finnick, and he made an appearance with his family today. He walked right passed Haymitch, not even looking towards my mom, but coming directly to me. His arms wrap around me and it all feels so foreign to me, but I don't stop myself from hugging him back.

"I'm so sorry Katniss." He whispers in my ear, as though I haven't heard people say that all day. I'm not sure how to respond so I don't, I just enjoy his alien touch.

"This is all my fault Katniss." this catches me off guard. Why would he think this is his fault? He wasn't even in the same town as us.

"How?" I ask, his hands begin to rub circles in my back.

"If I didn't talk to her you two wouldn't have been there at that time. If I could have just let you go."

"Peeta..." I trail off not knowing what to say.

"Better yet, if I didn't make such a big deal about you being at that stupid hotel you would have been in Cincinnati. And you wouldn't be standing here right now." He pulls away and looks me in the eyes, tears threatening to spill.

"Peeta this couldn't be predicted, don't blame yourself." Is all I can think to say.

"But-"

"Peeta please don't make this any harder." I say and he nods.

"I um, I know this is a bad time but we should talk soon. Would you like to talk next week?" He asks.

"No." I say to Anxiously, "after this is over please let us talk. I know it will be on my mind and I don't want it to be."

"Alright. I will find you at 8." I nod and he does the unexpected. He leans in and kisses me cheek, then hugs me once more. Then he moves back to Haymitch and then to my mom. Lastly he walks to the casket. Whether his kiss was because he has decided he wants to try again, or if it was out of pitty, it doesn't matter because it still sent a rush of electricity through my body. But it didn't last long before I was embraced in both of his brothers. I glance at Peeta, starting down at Prim's body, and I see him whisper the words 'I'm sorry.' everything about this day had completely ruined me forever, inside and out.

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Written on my phone again so probably some spelling mistakes!

Hopefully I can update some more, but Drivers Ed won't end until Thursday :/ I'll be busy for awhile, so I just pray that you'll get more updates!

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I get to go pick up my car tomorrow! Yay! :) hahah!

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