Part 1: 4:30 A.M.

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My hands fumble in the dark / corners and my mind is dripping— / dripping / the iris rummaging through every / frame / piece by / piece / even the smooth skin is crying / the soft cool sheets / hide with fear, / the spring mattress wrought and warm / with questions and suddenly— / a jolt of static / my lids popping open, / broken breath / air that's not even air / anymore / my fist is still / shaking / its just me, / in this room / an open space / that never felt this tight / nothing but / me, sweat, / bags under my eyes, / and nobody else / nobody this time.

I'm awake I'm awake I'm awake I'm awake I'm awake I'm awake I'm awake I'm awake I'm aw

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