The Potion Princess

The Order of the Phoenix

Being in the Order was exciting.

Sitting through Order meeting, however, was not.

Audra tries to sit by Tonks or Bill if she can, because she can count on Bill to wake her up if she starts to fall asleep and Tonks always laughs at the doodles Audra scribbles onto spare pieces of parchment. There's too many of them crammed into the one room, and half the time they're all crowded around one table to look at a spread of maps or sitting shoulder to shoulder as McGonagall relays yet another important message from Dumbledore.

They argue, mostly. It always starts out good, but when it comes down to it they're just a bunch of people trying to find their way through the dark and tensions run high. Normally, its Sirius who starts it, making some sort of snide remark, and Snape snaps back until its an all out brawl that Remus needs to break up. And then once they manage to sit down again Mad-Eye brings up some super secret, semi dangerous operation that everyone's been putting off planning, and Molly will get upset and have to be calmed down by either Bill or Arthur or Tonks, because she doesn't want to do anything that might put any of them in danger. And anyone under the age of thirty will tell her that they'll be fine because they're more willing to fight than Audra would have thought possible.

Typically, Audra doesn't have to pay attention. Dumbledore told her she doesn't need to come to these meetings at all, and that really, the less she knows the better. That being said, she feels like she needs to make an appearance sometimes, even if all she does is slouch in her chair and filter information back to the twins, who are still beyond angry they aren't allowed to sit in at meetings. Today, though, Snape was talking, so she sits up straight and makes an effort to pay attention. A corner of his mouth twitches when he sees her, and it reminds her of those times back in class where he would catch her dozing off in class or sending notes to the Weasley's.

It ends, eventually, and Audra hangs back as everyone tries to squeeze out the door at once. By the time she makes it out, the twins have already started up the same, tired argument with their mother, just like they do every time after a meeting. "You can't tell us what to do anymore!" Fred yells. He's always been the more hot headed one between the two, and that's saying something, but at least George would have managed to hold his tongue. "We're of age!"

"So long as you live under my roof, you'll follow my rules!"

"We're not under your roof!" Fred bellows back, face red. "We're in the bloody Order headquarters, you might as well let us join up!"

"Audra gets to fight," George says sourly. He sounds like a little kid pouting, but Fred's face lights up like it's Christmas and snatches on the one argument they hadn't exhausted yet.

"She's even younger than we are and she gets to be spy!" He points over at her wildly, and Audra tries to melt against the wall. Mrs. Weasley's already upset enough that Audra joined up, she doesn't want to make it worse. "All we want to do is sit on meetings."

"You're too young." Molly's voice climbed, and the racket in the kitchen raises even further, like they wanted to at least try and give the three of them some privacy. "There's no need for you to fight."

"I want to fight!"

Audra has enough time to think no, merlin no, he's not allowed before Snape was flying around the corner, grabbing Audra by the shoulders and hauling her to the middle of the room. Mrs. Weasley pauses with her wand up and mouth open. At the very least, audra thought tiredly, this got them to stop yelling.

"I heard you," he snarls. "I was across the room, and I heard you, blathering on about how much you care about those boys and how much you worry." He say the word like its something dirty, spit flying. He reaches out to Audra and shakes her hard enough that her head wobbles back and forth. She's so startled that she doesn't lift a hand to defend herself. This man, who terrified most of her classmates but never even had an unkind word to say to her before, now looked like he was ready to kill her where she stood. "You cannot let your guard down even for a moment! If he finds out the truth you'll be dead! And you better believe there'll be a death order on all our heads then."

"We're at headquarters," she said frantically, and wonders how long he'd be listening and watching, just waiting for her to slip. "I didn't think I needed it, there wasn't anyone listening."

"Stupid," He lets her go and she stumbles backwards. "They are always listening." Audra thinks its over for a second, that the quiet means that things have calmed down, and knows that this is a good lesson for her to learn. But then a second later and he is invading her mind before she's ready, with such force that memories flip through her mind like pages in a photo album- Fred's hand in hers, the letters burning, Clary, Emmeline, dancing with Vance, the dark Lord. She scrambles to construct the block, but he tears it down piece by piece and the pain of it makes her sink to her knees.

"Enough." There's a bang and Snape's wand flies out of his hand. The pressure in her head lets up, and when Audra's vision swims back into focus, she sees McGonagall standing in front of her, hand out stretched. "That's enough, Severus. The girl has learned her lesson."

"No," Audra struggles to her feet, gasping. "Again."

Again, and again, and again. She had never had her skills tested under torture, and the awfulness of it makes her concentration slip, letting Snape see more scraps and images. The pain makes her feel like her skull is splitting open, and every nerve is on fire. She screams, and screams, and begs and pleads but Snape does not let up. You have to go through this, he told her. It'll keep you safe, in the long run.

It is Mad-Eye and Bill who come to get her eventually. They pull her off the floor and half carry her back towards the living room, dumping her down on the couch. There was a small crowd of people waiting for her, including Fred and a tear stained Hermione. Dinner, Audra realizes, looking around at the half empty plates, must have been moved in here.

She looks towards Fred, because she always does, He's already there, kneeling beside her. "Still want to be in the Order?"

He didn't smile. "If you fight, I fight."

They are talking in whispers, and Audra rides along the wave of her conversation until Sirius walks over, holding a bottle. "Drink," He grins down at her with a skeletal smile, and Audra raises it to her lips, ignoring Mrs. Weasley's disapproving look. "It'll feel better."

Audra attempts to choke it down, but ends up spitting it all over the coffee table and Fred. "What the bloody hell was that?" She shrieks, but he hadn't been lying. She does feel better.

She stays there until the crowd goes away, back to their bedrooms and homes. Mrs. Weasley comes back with an armful of blankets and stares down at her sadly, like the sight of her hurts. "You're all just children. Children, fighting in this big, bloody war."

Molly movies to lay the covers over her, and Audra places her hand over Mrs. Weasley's. "I'll protect them. You know that, right? No matter what."

"Oh, Audra." Mrs. Weasley smoother her hair back, in the same way she must have done for ginny when she was sick. "But who's going to protect you?"