The Coño Boy 1 & 2: Love What You Will

Chapter Eight: Slow-Motion + Sexy Music + Guys in Swimming Trunks

Umahon si Joaquin from the pool using those stainless steel bars to get off the water. Just like a leading man -wait, a sexy leading man na may dramatic reveal with special effects na may slight shimmer at slowly flowing yung water pababa ng body niya. And seriously, sinuot talaga niya yung revealing maroon swim trunks that we bought. Well... at least I got a taste of what's inside those trunks.

Joaquin: Wala pa ba si Coach?

Me: Huh?

Joaquin: I said, wala pa ba si Coach?

I had to collect myself for a moment there. Kahapon pa ako basag-na-basag, Joaquin, ano ba?

Me: Uhm, no eh. Nagpa sign-up na ako ng attendance there.

Joaquin: I'll sign na rin. Let me just get my towel.

"Guys, sinong Beadle sa class na to?"

I hear someone from across the pool to where the varsity boys are. I raise my hand to call his attention. Moments later this tall and lean guy that owns that voice makes his way towards me. Keep it coming, Lord! Hahahaha!

Tall and Lean Muscular Varsity Guy: Uhm ---

He starts as if gusto malaman ang name ko...

Me: It's Sean.

Tall and Lean Muscular Varsity Guy: Ah, Tom. The name's Tom.

Okay, he introduced himself. May name na siya; hirap mag-type pag buong description eh.

Tom: Nagpa-attendance ka na?

He asks in a very malambing and somewhat provinciano tone.

Sean: Just a while ago.

Tom: Okay, bilin ni Coach mag-skills assessment tayo ng classmates mo with the varsity swimming team.

Sean: What skills assessment?

Tom: Ah i-check daw kung anong swimming skills meron kayo and yung varsity mag-assess.

Sean: Oh okay.

Tom: May iniwan na mga xerox si Coach don sa may bleachers, distribute mo sa class, sabihin mo fill out nila.

Sean: So, sino first?

Tom: Kung sino na lang mauna matapos sa form?

Sean: Wait, I'll number the forms na lang para may order.

Tom: Okay. Sige, bigay ko sayo yung forms.

Sean: Is that all gagawin for class today?

Tom: Yun lang ang bilin ni Coach Bok. Ma-late daw siya kaya inendorse class sakin.

Sean: So we can go after the assessment?

Tom: Uhm, wala pa instructions if early dismissal.

Sean: Okay, saan na yung forms.

I followed Tom to get the forms. Then bumalik sa classmates ko para kunin yung attendance sheet at pen. I counted 27 guys in total sa class namin, including me, then numbered the forms. I distributed the forms randomly. Later, kinuha ko yung post-it notes sa sling bag ko to write numbers on para sa assessment. I explained to my classmates yung instructions ni Coach Bok. I distributed the forms and inabot ko yung numbered post-it notes kay Tom. Then I called my classmates to attention.

Me: Okay, guys! Start tayo with numbers 1 to 3 in like two minutes, okay?

With a general consensus of nods, looks like we're good.

Joaquin: Naks! Efficient si Class Beadle ah.

Me: Impressed?

Joaquin: Yesterday pa ako na-impress.

Sheeessshhh! I turn my face with my mouth wide open na slightly irritated kay Joaquin. And tinawanan na lang niya ako. I swear! This guy is messing with me.

Tom: Number 1,2, and 3!

Ayan na, skills assessment is a go.

Me: Guys, please don't forget your number is on your form ah. Number 1 to 3 please!

One of our classmates steps forward followed by two more. I noticed nag-aasaran na rin yung iba seems like they got acquainted na.

Joaquin: So, I forgot to ask. Marunong ka ba mag-swim?

Me: Uhm, yeah... I took swimming lessons when I was a kid.

Joaquin: So, why did you tell me the other day na you don't like swimming?

Me: Childhood trauma. Natalo ako sa summer league ng classes namin in a most embarrasing way.

Joaquin: Seriously, dude?

Me: Yup! As in, totally embarrasing. Next time na lang yung story na yan. Baka if nakuwento ko na yang story na yan, mawalan na ako ng mystery.

I flash him a smile at nag-smile naman siya and raised his eyebrows twice in response. I think slowly nawawala na yung awkwardness ng situation from earlier this morning.

Tom: Guys, watch niyo yung ginagawa namin para alam niyo na pag tinawag kayo.

Sigaw ni Tom from the other end of the pool area.

One hour or so later, inabot sakin ni Tom yung lahat ng numbered assessment forms. I was able to pick number 24 so may tatlo pang guys after me while number 21 si Joaquin. I was expecting him to hit the showers na pero tumambay pa siya sa bleachers with his towel around his waist at playing on his phone.

Me: Thanks.

Tom: Uhm, Sean. Nag-compete ka ba nung high school?

Me: Me? No.

Tom: Na-check mo ba yung time mo?

Me: What?

Tom: Yung time mo kanina sa test lap.

Me: Oh, what about it?

Tom: Competitive time siya. Pang-competition yung test lap mo kanina.