The Guy Next Door

Chapter 25

My fingers flexed over my door handle as I debated whether I should ask him what's wrong, it's just a friendly question and I'm entitled to at least an explanation as to why he is shouting. My feet stayed rooted to the ground though, refusing to start forward and do as my brain commanded -it's not really my business and demanding to know would be crossing a line I don't plan on doing any time soon.

Although I'm not sure what exactly we are, I'm not a foolish girl who has believed in a delusional relationship forming over these past couple of weeks. A friendship definitely has formed, much to my surprise and that's as far as I think it will go for Wes and I.

Yes, we had sex -twice- but that doesn't mean that I was going to entertain the idea of us truly being together. Knocking on his door would be like jumping across the friendship line and entering the confusing 'feelings' area that came with intimate relationships. Mulling over the last thought I decided I didn't want to venture out of the comfort zone Wes and I were in. With that I entered my apartment without sparing a glance behind me as Wes's voice floated through the door.

"I've sent the schedule to the entire floor with a list of due dates for each department." Amy informed me, her almond shaped eyes darting down to my hand as I drummed my fingers softly against the circular desk. Fixing her gaze she studied me curiously and for a moment I forgot that she awaited for me to give her another errand.

Clearing my throat I smoothed out the front of my cream colored blouse, wincing when I realized it was turning into a bad habit. "You can go for lunch now." I said, excusing her

With a nod she started to take her leave when I called out to her, she stared back at me confusingly but didn't say a word.

"Did anyone call?" I asked warily

"Yes, the publishers departmen-"

"No, Amy." I shook my head stopping her from the long list of work related calls I received today "I meant personal calls, other than my mother that is."

Her eyes softened with pity, the emotion one I've grown too accustomed to by my middle aged secretary. On holiday weekends when I call to ask where a certain file is, on my birthday when I stay till nearly midnight. It was a look that spoke volumes - 'poor boss doesn't have anyone who cares'. Swallowing past the lump lodged in my throat I couldn't hold her stare any longer, averting my eyes I gave a dismissive wave unsure if my throat would work. Tentatively Amy left, shutting the door softly behind her but the soft click sounded too loud in my ears.

He didn't call.

Not last night, not today. Biting my bottom lip I wondered why he didn't stop by last night. It's not as if he promised me but I was expecting-

Stupid girl! His life doesn't revolve around you, a voice sneered.

Releasing a frustrated sigh, I wondered for the umpteenth time if I should have knocked on his door but I knew my pride would never allow me to do such a thing. No matter how much I longed for his presences I couldn't bring myself to walk the small distance or even lift my phone and call him. Stubbornness was something I inherited from my mother, both a gift and curse depending on the situation. Right now it was a curse.

Perhaps I could go see him. Quickly shaking the idea away I twisted in the dark swivel chair when something caught my eye, reaching for Carrie's draft I corrected yesterday while I pitifully waited for Wes. Collecting my phone off the desk, I snatched my tote bag off the hanger and started out the door in long, determined strides.

Avoiding eye contact I explained to Amy that I was going out for lunch and left the building well aware of the woman's gaze on my back. Making my way down to the parking lot I hopped in my car, going on by memory I drove down the busy streets of the upper east side to the west side. Circling around the area a few times I found the restaurant. Mustering up all the courage I had I stepped out of the car, -lucky I found a parking spot around the corner- on trembling legs I made my way to the decently sized restaurant and inhaled a deep, calming breath and walked in.