Stay | Arctic Monkeys Fanfiction

Eighteen- Satisfaction Feels Like A Distant Memory

2005

"Holy shit, Al," I said, looking around the crowded room. "Are all of these people here to see you guys?"

I couldn't believe my eyes. It was the first time they'd done a solo gig, and I hadn't expected even half of the amount of people that showed up. But there we were, walking into the packed room.

Alex shrugged casually, but I could see that he was trying to hide his own shock. "We posted some music online. People seem to like it, I think."

My eyes scanned over the crowd. "You think?"

He smiled a bit, following my eyes. "I guess so."

"Remember when I was the only one at the Hellcat who would watch you guys play?" I said to him. "Now look at you. You better remember me when you get all famous, okay?"

He opened his mouth to say something but Matt pulled him toward the stage before he could. He gave me an apologetic look and I just shook my head dismissively. Lately I was getting used to him having more important things to do then hang around me.

They'd starting writing and recording more songs, taking their music more seriously than before. All four of them were so busy lately, especially Alex, and tonight had been the first night all of us had been free to spend time together. But of course the term "free" was being used pretty loosely, because most of our time was going to be eaten up by their performance.

I couldn't even find a place to stand during their show. I had to lean up against the wall in the very back, watching the crowd jump and surge to the music. And I was so, so happy to see all of the support and energy from the crowd, but I couldn't help but feel so far away. And not just physically.

And while a part of me wanted nothing but the absolute best for them, another part of me was wishing that things could go back to the way they were a year ago, back before all their time was spent on music.

Maybe that made me a bad friend, but I couldn't help it. I missed them.

I missed him.

The show dragged on into the later half of the night, and the crowd only began to clear out after coaxing the lads into not one, but two encores. They all looked exhausted by the time the room was empty enough to walk through.

The lads were taking down all the equipment and moving it out back to the van, but Alex was just sitting on the edge of the stage, his eyes kind of glazed over.

"You alright, mate?" I asked hopping up next to him.

"They knew the words to the songs," he said with muted shock. "They knew my words, Dav."

"Because they love you guys," I told him. "You have something really good going here, Al."

He seemed to chew on my words. Neither of us spoke for a long time, both of us just staring out at the dwindling crowd together.

"And it'll never happen, by the way," he said suddenly.

I looked over to him. "Huh?"

"You said earlier about me forgetting about you when we get famous," he said, meeting my gaze. "As if I could ever forget you."

And even though the words made me smile and hit his shoulder with mine, deep down, I didn't believe him. I couldn't believe him.

Because I could already feel them starting to move on from me, as their lives took off and mine stayed cemented to Sheffield.

And even with Alex sitting right there next to me, the two of us laughing and joking around like we always had, I could already feel him beginning to forget me.