The Girl Who Feared Men (SAMPLE)

Chapter 5: The Video

"Let me rephrase my previous question. Can you grate cheese on his jawline?"

I wipe the sweat forming on my forehead and I ponder this for a while. He did have a pretty sharp jawline.

"Okay, yes, but-" I start.

"Aha!" Angie exclaims.

"He's attractive, sure. Whatever. But that doesn't take away his egotistical jerkface-ness-" I try to explain before I'm cut off by Angie again.

"Wait. Pause. Does Jessa know ?" She says, her tone becoming more serious.

My stomach sinks when I think of what Jessa would do if she found out that I flipped a guy today. Probably something along the lines of shipping me to some mental institution where I can get professional help.

I could feel the shivers running down my spine as I thought of the- very real- scenario.

"No, and she's not going to," I say.

"Ellie!" She scolds.

I walk over to the only other machine in my personal weight room, the leg press.

"Angie, everything is under control. This was just... A bump in the road," I say while putting more weights on the machine. Jessa has yet to mention anything about a new therapist meaning that she is either searching for one at the moment OR she trusts me. Which doesn't happen very often. Regardless of her motives, this is the first time in a long time that I have gone therapist free and I don't plan on jinxing anything by telling her that things are starting to get a little hard.

"You're going to be sitting beside him for the rest of the semester-"

"Yeah and I can handle that. Besides he's not even going to bother me. He hates me just as much as I hate him. Also, I don't even need him to talk to me, if I have a guy sitting beside me every day for four and a half months straight, my phobia is going to be gone in a heartbeat." I put my phone on the ground and sit in the metal chair while I rest my feet against the 160 slab of metal. I feel my confidence rise as I begin to realize how smart it was to stay seated next to Chase.

"Ellie I don't know, I still think you should at least tell Jessa..."

"Angie! Everything is under control-" before I can finish my sentence, my phone beeps.

"What is that?" Angie asks.

"Uh, maybe incoming call? I'll check, hold on Angie."

I get up and out of the leg press machine before picking up my phone. It's Kiara. I remember giving her and Julianna my number during Bio but wonder what she might be calling me for.

"Hello?" I say.

"Ellie! Look-" Julianna begins to say.

"No, let me speak!" Kiara yells.

"Kiara, no. You're going to make everything sound way more dramatic than it really is-"

"No I won't!" Kiara gasps.

"Okay, one at a time, what is it?" I intervene.

"Somebody uploaded the video of you flipping Chase online. We just thought you might want to know," Julianna finally says.

"I wanted to say it," Kiara whines, I can practically see her pouting.

Oh.

Oh, this is bad. Jessa can't find that video. I don't know what she would do. But I just know that it wouldn't be good.

My phobia is really putting a strain on her emotionally. I can see the hurt in her eyes every time she notices the trembling hands or the panic in my eyes. A slip-up like this could send us packing halfway across the world.