A Final Chance to be Forever Together {Skylox} [FINAL BOOK]

talkin bout my sad life n shit (Edited)

(dad if you are reading this bACK AWAY AND DONT READ IT)

Hey, Potatoes. I know you guys are probably sick of these stupid little interruptions, and I know I made a book for putting a bunch of updates and shit in there, but I just need to get this out.  Also, I have deleted some stuff from this so people who have read when this first came out know some more things, and they also know things that are no longer true. If anyone who knows me in real life reads this, please don't think any differently of me, even though it might be hard...

Now, this is... personal. If you are sick of all this personal shit, I advise you to just wait for the next chapter of this (BOOTIFUL) story. Please don't get mad at me for doing ANOTHER interruption, I'm very sorry. Now, onto the actually idea of this chapter. 

Lately I've been... depressed. Everyone talks shit about me where I go, and I believe them. Nobody can convince to not believe what they say, no matter what. Last year in 4th grade (damn, I feel real young xD) I didn't let all this crap get to me. So if someone called me ugly, I'd just say "Yeah, I know." or "So are you." And then I'd get on with my life. But no, not this time. It used to just be all the rude kids who'd talk shit about me, but now its my very own friends who are joining. I'm always being made fun of, where ever I go. I'm sick of it.

I wish I could tell people how I feel, but I don't really think it'll make a difference. Everyone at my school talks shit about eachother, and I hate it. One of my friends (who shall be named Mary {no, shes not a murderer} for now) always gets bullied, and she cuts. I feel so bad for her, but I don't really think I can do anything. Also, she's bi. She's dating another girl, and I'm really happy for her. Anyways, time to get really personal. (they broke up)

I'm fucking done with all this shit people talk about me. I'm just fucking done with... people. Nobody really cares what you think anymore. They don't care if you hate yourself, or even KILL yourself. Nobody fucking cares anymore. 

(This ended a long time ago. >>) Everyonce in a while, my two friends (who shall be named Rose and Amy, because I dont you guys to track them down) and I text about our depression. We all share stories of what we've been through, and we always tell eachother if we cut. We don't hide anything from eachother. Well, ALMOST anything. Whenever Amy is depressed, she always texts a knife emoji. Rose and I always respond, making sure that she's alright, even though that we are all slowly dying inside. Rose and Amy are the amazing. Even though they aren't named, they know who they are. Guys, I love both of you (...no homo). I could never ask for better friends who are always by my side. We all feel like crap, but we always support eachother.

One time, Mary stood up for me. I was getting bullied by a bunch of annoying dick heads, and she actually stood up for me. It was a terrible day, but I'm just so surprised that she told off those dick heads. But, after that, I cut. I couldn't help it. Mary is a great friend, and I know she's not reading this, becasue she doesn't have a wattpad. But, Mary, don't let anyone bother you. Don't let all those fuckers call you fat, or make fun of you for dating another girl. 

People say that the kind of music you listen too shows how you feel. I agree. My favorite band is Pierce The Veil, and if you listen to their songs you can kind of understand how I'm feeling. Their lyrics are just so fucking inspirational... 

Mary, Rose, and Amy. You guys are my best friends. If one of you decides to... go, I'm coming with you, and no one will stop me. We are all depressed, but somehow we will make it through this hell hole called life. When I first found about all of you being depressed, I was heart broken. But, then I knew that I wasn't alone, and people my age actually felt the same way. And maybe it'll all be over soon... And if we are all feeling like it, we could pull a Sherlock together to end this all... (Sherlockians would understand if they watched 'The Reichenbach Fall') 

ADDED INFO>> I got three new friends who will be named Charlie, Lucifer, and Cas. (they are girls btw) They help me a lot, too, and they also are, well, depressed. Charlie is amazing. But it seems that she deals with for bullying than me, and I feel so bad for her. And her mom is horrible to her, which makes everything worse. It pains me to here about the things she has to deal with. Stay stroing, Charlie! Also, Cas, YOU ARE NOT FAT! NOR UGLY! YOU ARE SKINNY AND PERFECT AND TALENTED AND BEAUTIFUL (no homo doe), AND DON'T LET ANYONE CHANGE THAT! Also, Lucifer, I know you are going through tough times, and I'm here for you if you ever want to talk. You are amazing, and I really hope you will one day stop cutting bECAUSE YOU ARE AMAZINGGGGG. But we all sorta help each other out, and they are really great. Also, I'm lonely as fuck. I'm always an outcast, and it fucking sucks. I'm not gonna add any more to that though...

Now that I think about, when I was between the ages 4-6, I would always say that I'm a mistake after my mom would get mad at me, or even at the most random times. Usually it was whenever I was playing alone outside, and sometimes I even thought that I wasn't from Earth, and I was just some weird alien that nobody likes...

You know, its really hard to write this. And I'm sorry if this ruined your day... But, you Potatoes are amazing human beings, and I love every single one of you. I trust you guys so much. I'm telling over 300 (now over 590... ily guys) strangers my deepest secrets. That's how much you guys mean to me. 

Well, I guess this is it. Again, I'm sorry if you are sick of these chapters, but I just needed to say this. And if you aren't a little shit, and actually care about me, thank you. But I don't deserve your sympathy, and I never will. 

Well, goodbye, Potatoes. See you guys soon...