down in the dumps

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really, its an unforgiving statement,  

definitive, but vast

simple, but complex

since when did people decide that my really-fucking-shit days and breakdowns were beautiful, simple heart-breaks

since when did they understand the feeling of breathing through broken lungs, having frogs stuck in throats that cannot leap, torn skin on fingers that keep shedding on dry days, bleeding and bleeding and bleeding

since when did they understand any of this?

they title my misery as an indie film to be sobbed about. i am not a love story to be picked up on dusty shelves during a rainy day, i am not scars that do not heal on wrists  or crumbling bones to be ground into fine ash

i am sick.

i am not your broken pieces.

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