Alexander Hamilton And The Gayest Summer Ever

Everyone Gets Wet

A/N: I still really hate a fictional turtle that bexie161 and I thought up.

Loud music wasn't enough.

Hamilton was sure he would never be able to look Hercules or Lafayette in the eye ever again.

The next morning, Laurens was up early again, talking to his turtles. Hercules and Lafayette were cuddled up together, asleep, and Hamilton was bored, so he sat beside Laurens on the floor and looked over at the turtles in his hand.
"Tell me about your turtles."
"Why?"
"I'm bored." Hamilton shrugged.
"Okay." Laurens smiled.

"Uh... this is Marie." He pointed to a large turtle which was eating. "She's a bully. She steals al, the food and hurts the others, but I can't find anybody else to take her and I won't just release her into the wild so... I guess I'm stuck with her. This is Joseph, Paul, Yves, Roch...." As he said each name, pointed out the turtle. They got smaller as he went through them. Finally, he lifted the tiny turtle in his hand up. "And Gilbert. He's taken one too many bashes to the head from Marie, and now he can't walk in a straight line. I have to feed him separately so they rest don't hurt him.
"Aww."

Hamilton then frowned, recognising the names. He couldn't place where from, though...
"How did you think of their names?" He inquired.
"I didn't. Hercules did. Never let him name anything. He'll just name it after Laf." He laughed. That's where the names were from; they were Lafayette's first and middle names.

"So..." they lapsed into awkward silence.
"Tell me about yourself." John requested suddenly.
"What is there to tell?" Hamilton laughed nervously.
"Come on, anything! Interests, family, friends..." Friends, nope. Family, nope.
"Uh... I like reading." Hamilton shrugged.
"What genres?" John asked eagerly.
"Non-fiction. History."
"Oh, cool. I can never seem to stay interested in stuff like that. So what do you wanna be when you're older?" Hamilton was relieved to be asked about something he could answer easily. He had thought about his future a lot.
"Either a politician or a lawyer." He told John.
"I bet you'd make a good lawyer."
"How?"
"You seem like the kind of person to hold up well in a fight."
"I suppose I do." He had had plenty of practise, though a lot of it was physical, and he usually lost those. Verbally, however, he was an excellent fighter. Unfortunately, his quick wit and short fuse usually led to him getting punched.

"What about you?"
"I presume I'll be expected to continue my father's business, since I'm the eldest child. Unless he finds out I'm still gay." Laurens looked down at Gilbert sadly. "Then he'll probably disown me."
"But what do you want to be?" Hamilton asked. He moved forward, as if to comfort him, then hesitated. Laurens frowned, thinking.
"Maybe a vet. Or a marine biologist. I like animals. Or an artist, but I'd never become successful enough to make a living." He shrugged.
"You don't know that." Hamilton said encouragingly. John responded with a humourless laugh.
"Lets be real, Alexander."

Before they could discuss the matter further, Lafayette stirred. As he woke up, he awoke Hercules, too. Laurens put Gilbert back, sending a threatening glare to Marie, who didn't seem interested. Hamilton giggled.

"Good morning." Hercules yawned.
"Morning." Laurens smiled. Hamilton got to his feet and started collecting up some clean clothes, a towel, shampoo and conditioner. He was still quite dirty from the swim in the lake the day before. The others started doing the same thing, clearly also having plans to wash off the remaining mud from the lake. They headed to the showers together.

"What activities are on today?" Laurens asked as they walked.
"Canoeing, I think." Lafayette said.
"Alright. If any of you tip us over after we've showered you'll suffer." Laurens warned.
"Only two people can fit in a canoe at a time, and Herc and I are going together, mon amie." Lafayette said softly, obviously guilty for abandoning him.
"Oh."
"You can go with me, if you like." Alexander offered. He hated seeing John so disappointed.
"Oh, thanks, Alexander!" He grinned.
"No problem." He smiled back.

The showers passed uneventfully, then Washington set out the canoes. Lafayette, Hercules and John all had fun watch Alexander shriek as he stepped onto the wobbly canoe. He wasn't afraid of water, but falling into it would still be unpleasant. It was even more embarrassing when the others clambered into the canoes effortlessly. Except John, who stayed on the shore, arguing with Washington.

"This is stupid." John complained, tugging at his ill-fitting life jacket. "We don't have to wear these when we swim. Why is this any different?" He was only debating the subject because the orange life-jacket was too short, only reaching half-way down his torso.
"If you fall and hit your head, you won't be able to consciously stay afloat." Washington informed him with a sigh suggesting they had been over this before. John muttered something incoherent, signalling that he had run out of arguments, then seated himself in the canoe.
"You're going to have to help me with this." Alexander warned him. "I've never done this before."

It was surprisingly easy. Alex wasn't sure why, but he had expected it to be harder. Other than having to put in quite a bit of effort to actually move significantly, it was simple. Neither boy really wanted to get anywhere fast, so they mostly just floated along, occasionally steering the boat out of the way of somebody else.

"Hamilton." John distracted him from leaning over the edge of the boat, staring at the murky water. He was grinning mischievously.
"What?" He had turned his head, but was still leaning over the edge of the boat. Laurens suddenly started leaning side to side, rocking the canoe precariously. Alexander may have screamed.

"Stop!" He had managed to get into an upright position and was clutching the sides of the boat, not sure if he was laughing or crying. "John, stop it!"
"Why?" He rocked it harder. "You're cute when you're scared."
"Because I'm going to die, that's why!" Alexander shrieked. Wait, cute? Before he could ponder on the word choice more, Lafayette started screaming too.

This wasn't something that should surprise anyone, and it didn't until Hercules joined the chorus. Laurens stopped rocking the boat to watch the commotion a little way away. Hercules and Lafayette were in their feet, both exclaiming curses quite loudly. Hamilton noticed disapproval on Washington's face before concern covered it as the boat clearly began to sink.
"What's going on?" He asked.
"I don't know. Let's get closer." Laurens started to row, and Hamilton joined him. By the time they got close enough to really see what was happening, Laf and Herc were thigh-deep in the water.

"What's going on?" Laurens asked when they were in earshot. He stood up to see them better. Alex grabbed the sides of the canoe as he stood, still worried about falling in.
"I don't know! It just started sinking!"
"I told you not to eat beforehand. You're too heavy."
"I doubt a few marshmallows made a difference, mon amie." Lafayette said sincerely, not catching the sarcasm.

"Can we get in your boat?"
"No!" Laurens protested. "Four people in one? You'll sink it!"
"Alexander looks like he weighs nothing." Hercules argued.
"Hey!" It was true; he was scrawny and short. He was still offended, though.
"But I don't." John pointed out.
"You're right. Thank you for your sacrifice." They suddenly grabbed him and pulled him out of the boat, screaming. Hamilton couldn't help laughing, mainly just because of how he screamed after laughing at Hamilton for doing the same thing. He emerged a moment later, spitting water at Hercules, who had initiated the dunking. Clearly he wasn't always a concerned parent.

Their canoe was now fully submerged, and they were shoulder-deep in the water. Washington was already rowing towards them, towing another canoe behind his own. He seemed to be having trouble, having to switch the oar around to stop sailing in circles. His bad planning was slowing him down a lot.

"Join us, Alexander!" Lafayette laughed.
"I think I'll pass."
"You can't sail back on your own. You'll end up going in circles or being a slow as George."
"I can try."

"What happened?" George Washington asked as he sailed over, sounding more resigned than shocked.
"We don't know. It just started sinking."
"And why is John in the water?"
"They pulled me in." He glared at the pair, who just grinned in response.

Washington directed Herc and Laf to the canoe he had been towing along. With much difficulty, they managed to get in. Hamilton waited, laughing as John ungraciously pulled himself into the canoe, them lay at Alexander's feet, panting.
"You could have helped me." He complained.
"Hm. Maybe next time." Hamilton replied with a smirk. "That's what you get for threatening to tip the boat earlier." John sighed.
"Fair enough."