quit-reset-try again {destiel}

the clean up

The next morning came around far sooner than both boys wanted, though they'd never admit it.

Cas was first to wake up, always an early riser. He reluctantly peeled himself from Dean, standing up and stretching. Sighing in relief, he looked down at his long lost love.

Dean had put him through so much pain and heartbreak, and yet, Cas was still infatuated with the green-eyed boy. Staring at they way deans eyelashes fanned out across his perfect cheekbones, dotted with freckles, Cas smiled fondly when he heard a deep, peaceful sigh slip past those flawless Cupid bows lips.

He remembered the way they felt pressed against his own, remembered the way those eyes pierced him, remembered the way they were so close Cas could count those freckles. Of its own accord, Cas' hand reached out and shifted the sheets so they covered dean better, and his knuckles lightly brushed deans cheekbone. A murmur from Dean snapped Cas back into harsh reality. Yanking his hand back, he crept quietly into the kitchen area of their dorm. If Cas remembered correctly, Dean was always ravenous when he woke up. Running his hands through his bed head, Cas thought about what breakfast he should make. Settling on pancakes, he plugged his earphones in, reached for the flour and got to work.

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Cas smiled widely when, 45 minutes later, he heard a groan from Dean, signalling he was awake.

Cas poured him a coffee and added two teaspoons of sugar and a substantial amount of milk, a complete opposite of his own, no sugar, and only the finest splash of milk. He sensed Dean behind him and turned, handing the still half asleep dean a mug of coffee. Dean murmured gratefully and took a few sips.

"Did you make pancakes?" Dean asked, tilting his head.

"Yeah. Dig in, there's tons here, and if I remember correctly, you're always starving in the morning." Cas smiled, reaching for an apple.

"Wow, Castiel you must have an amazing memory. I'm mean, hell, you remembered my coffee order." Dean smiled, and reached for a pancake, drowning it in syrup. Sure, it stung a bit Dean couldn't call him Cas, but he respected Cas' wishes.

"Want some pancake with your syrup?" Cas joked, biting his apple. Dean rolled his eyes.

"Haha. Very funny." Dean muttered sarcastically, stuffing his mouth full of pancake.

"I try." Cas laughed. His brain mentally slapped itself.

Stop flirting he's not into you like that, not anymore. Remember what happened last time.

Cas felt his scars sting and double-checked upper thighs were covered well. He glanced at Dean and self-consciously covered his stomach, and the scar that lay behind the thin fabric.

"Damn Castiel these pancakes are really good. Aren't you having any?" Deans voice went from praise to concern faster than Cas could snap his fingers.

"I've already had some." Cas lied, smiling. Dean smiled back and continued eating.

A few minutes later, Dean had eaten 10 pancakes, and orange, half the bottle of syrup, a banana (Cas had hastily gone to get changed when that happened) and drank two cups of coffee. Walking back into the room, Cas began washing the dishes.

"Woah Castiel. You cooked, you don't have to clean." Dean walked over to the sink and attempted to hip check Cas out of the way. Cas just shrugged and giggled.

"I like it." He assured, holding fast.

"No way. Move, I'm cleaning." Dean tried to playfully shove Cas out of the way. Cas laughed and picked up a handful of bubbles.

"Watch it Winchester." He growled, grinning.

"You wouldn't." Dean laughed

Cas smirked and pushed the bubbles onto Dean's face. Dean's mouth dropped open in shock.

"Oh it's on now." He laughed, retaliating with a handful of bubbles in Cas' hair. Cas cried out in shock and threw a handful of bubbles at Dean, who ducked and shoved some more bubbles at Cas. Cas dodged it and pushed an overflowing amount of bubbles into Dean's hair.

It ended up in a wrestling match. Dean had Cas pinned on the floor, straddling him, holding his wrists above his head.

"Give up?" Dean asked a cocky grin on his face, completely oblivious to what he was doing to Cas.

"Fine," Cas smirked, fighting to keep his voice steady. Dean smiled and got off of him. Hastily standing up and yanking his shirt down. If Dean noticed the panic in Cas' eyes, he didn't comment on it.

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Dean sat in his mechanics class, listening to some lecturer drone on and on and on about brakes and suspension, fighting sleep.

He thought back to last night where Cas- sorry Castiel, had held him. He didn't realize just how much he really missed that feeling. He'd freaked out when he woke and couldn't see Castiel anywhere and-

Oh. My. God. I am a dick. An asshole. The lowest of the low. If that what I felt like when I couldn't find Cas, how.....how did he feel, 4 years ago when I left?

It hit Dean just how much he'd hurt Castiel. And yet Castiel still remembered the little things. Like how he liked his coffee, how hungry he was in the mornings, how pancakes were second best to pie?

Sighing, Dean looked down at his paper. There were no notes, which is what he was supposed to be doing, instead, there was a sketch of a particular blue-eyed boy. Dean blushed and shoved the paper in his backpack.

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Cas sat in the middle of his biology class, bored out of his skull. He'd already finished the homework, his phone had just died, and he really, really needed a coffee. He'd only managed to have 1/2 a cup before he'd begun cleaning, and it had gone cold by the time he'd managed to pry the soap out of Dean's hand and clean the damn plates.

Absently letting his pen drift across the paper, to form words that he would no doubt read and re-read, trying to create something beautiful out of them, he let his mind fly.

And it flew straight to dean.

It flew to green eyes and freckles, to cheekbones and jaw lines.

It soared throughout the laughter he'd missed so badly, the grin that lit up his life, through, frowns and smiles, giggles, and gasps, moans and hisses.

Snapping back into reality, he glanced down at his paper and blushed deeply. It was full of one thing. Thoughts, fantasies, and ideas all about:

DEAN WINCHESTER

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Are we liking it so far? Keep pushing through, i promise you'll make it. Goodbye silver nuggets!