You're So Fragile

Chapter 3

        It's been 3 days since my last confrontation with Him. Maybe he did get the message. He probably realized it was stupid to spend money on such an expensive gift for someone he doesn't even know. I want to believe he will no longer try to contact me but there's a part of me that feels it's too good to be true. I mean, he's been so persistent about calling and messaging me. Why give up so easily? Whatever, I should just accept that he most likely got over trying to get my attention.

        These past three days have been, as always, simple and boring. All i've done is work, watch tv, and sleep. Today is my shopping day. The day I dread the most because that means I have to go outside and be near people. Everytime i step outside of my apartment it feels like my heart is going to explode. I get super anxious and i've never understood how people could just be around strangers and be perfectly fine with it. It's terrifying.

        I put on a pair of jeans, a band t-shirt, and a sweater. I get my keys and phone and take a deep breath before going outside. It doesn't always help my anxiety but it can be relieving sometimes. I get in my car and head for the grocery store. I hate it because even at night, it's always crowded. However, I find that it's better to do my shopping at night because it'd be much more crowded during the day. I do my clothes shopping online to avoid going to clothing stores. That's how bad my fear of people is.

        I always try to keep my head down when I'm in public to avoid making eye contact with people. If I make eye contact with someone they may try to talk to me and the thought of that is disastrous. I've become my mother.

        After my father left, she couldn't even look me in the eye. She'd barely even talk to me. I guess I looked too much like him. We had the same straight, jet-black hair and dark eyes. They didn't have the most functional marriage, in fact, they fought constantly. But he was all she had. The day he left, he was so drunk you could smell the whiskey in his breath from 10 feet away. My mother begged him to go to rehab and he lost it. He told me he was sorry for doing all of this and then called my mother a crazy bitch and walked out the door. He never came back, she was never the same.

        The only one who has tried to speak to me today was the cashier. He tried to make small talk but all I could do was nod and hand him the money. So overall, my trip to the grocery store was quite a success. Usually, i get a worker asking me if I need help with anything, or a customer asking me for help to find something- as if I work there. I don't know why this happens. It's not like I always have a warm, inviting smile on my face. I hardly ever smile at all.

        I get to my apartment and put the grocery bags on the kitchen counter. I go to my room to put on my pajamas when I realize something is wrong. My bed looks messy. I mean, it's not like I always make my bed to where it's an art form. I rarely make my bed since I spend so much time laying down anyway. But it looks like someone else has been lying in it. The blankets and sheets look more disheveled than usual. I look on my dresser and see that the necklace is gone. It's Him. He's been in my apartment.

        I run into the living room to make sure my door is locked and my heart literally stops. There he is. A tall, dark figure standing near the counter where i just put down the groceries. He's just standing there, casual as you like. He steps into the light and that's when fear completely consumes me. He's much larger in stature than I imagined. I can't look him in the eyes because I have this irrational fear that if I do, the look in his eyes will be enough to kill me. I see the necklace in his large, obviously strong hands. The diamonds gleam in the light and I close my eyes hoping I'm just imagining this. My eyes open when I'm startled by his deep voice.

        " You're not wearing the necklace I gave you. It was a gift. Why aren't you wearing it?" He says. I don't respond. I just keep my head down and he continues, " Why don't you answer me? Answer me. " He commands in such a stern voice.

        I figure my best chances of surviving this is to answer him and try to do as he says. I stumble on my words when i say:

        " I- I didn't... I didn't want to risk wearing it to the store... Someone may have tried to steal it.." I finally let out.

        " Oh good, I thought you were ashamed of me. I knew that message you sent me about not wanting the necklace was a joke. I mean, you can't deny my love for you when I bought you such an expensive gift, right?... Right Grace?" He says as he steps closer to me.

        Without even thinking, I run to my room to try and get my phone. I can hear his heavy footsteps behind me. I attempt to close the door once I get in but it's pushed wide open with such strength. I reach for my phone on the dresser when he pushes me down on my bed and pins me from behind. I'm about to scream for help when he tightly puts his hand over my mouth. His grip is so strong I can't even bite him.

        " Don't try to fight it. You'll only make this worse." He says as he sticks a needle in my arm. I scream but it's muffled. Then my vision goes blurry and it's all black.