To Fight Back, To Change

Chapter 14 - Pathetic, Is Me

Pathetic, falling for him the moment your alone. Pa.The.Tic. That’s what he called you, remember? REMEMBER! That’s what he called you over and over again. Pathetic, useless, cursed. I yelled to my wolf, she had felt my resistance and was trying desperately to batter some of the anger down.

 But she was still weak, only a voice in the back of my mind. I pushed her down hissing traitor! Before blocking my wolf entirely. It didn’t hurt, having been so accustomed to not having her for so long in the first place.

How could only a few minutes back in this hell-hole shatter all my work? I was disgusted with myself. So I did the only thing I really knew how to do anymore to stop thinking.  I lashed out.

My fist connected with Ash’s face before he even saw it coming. I could feel the reverberating crack hitch a ride up my own arm. He flew across the kitchen, landing roughly on the ground. Clara ran over to him with a little scream.  My hand instinctively went to Rachel but I pulled back from the thought of using her, no matter how much I wanted to. I needed to get out, desperately, otherwise I might not be able to control my own anger.

“I can find my own way. Kreja.Thanks.” I spat viciously.

Then I stomped out only to be greeted with a last few words from Mason as he walked past me. Bastard must have been waiting outside the kitchen.

“Kreja, really? So much for controlling your temper.”

*Unknown POV*

It’s first night back home. Quite a show to be heard of. Viscious. Untrained like a pup, not a wolf yet. But all pups can be trained and refined.  I just have to be patient. My insider should report soon, and then I’ll find out in more details how it has reacted to the beginning of the latest test.

*Ash’s POV*

Sadness flooded through me, grasping my heart and swallowing me whole. She has a child. This strange, enticing warrior has a child that could never be mine. I don’t why it bothered me so much, no-one had ever made me feels this way; except Alexis of course. But Ace isn’t Alexis. Otherwise she would never have been able to conceive. Right? Gah! Stop doubting everything My Wolf growled inwardly at me. Oh, so your back are you? I retorted. Silence

“Assshhhh.” A squeaky voice made me wince.  Clara can’t be without me for 5 bloody minutes could she! At first I saw her as strong – the perfect mate. But as time grew on I began to realise how pathetic she was. Leeching off everyone’s strengths and never dirtying her own hands. Alexis was never like that. No-matter what happened she always stood strong.

Ace was still talking on the phone. I sighed. ”Clara, go get your nails done or something. Ok?”

Her weasely face that I once thought beautiful scrunched up in a supposedly seductive pout.

“Get out!” I growled at her menacingly.  She whimpered at my voice and a small feeling of guilt pricked me. But there was too much to do to even notice it.

I felt the smug gaze of Ace on me and turned to see her leaning calmly on the wall. God, I thought, she’s gorgeous. Could liking her be labelled as cheating on Alexis? Even when she is presumed dead? The pull to her was so strong both my wolf and I were having trouble staying still. But Mason was still in the room and I was still the Jade Pack’s representative.

“So what’s the deal?” Her silky voice sung.  Her voice hypnotised me and scrambled all my thoughts. I took a moment to come back to reality then said.

“Not now, I’m pretty sure you’re both exhausted, I’ll show you to your rooms and we can talk tomorrow.” I said, my mood plummeting at the thought of showing them my Father. I can probably keep them away from him tonight, make sure they get a good rest.  There are a couple of wings free in the east wing I can probab….”Do you share a room?”

 I hadn’t considered the fact and it burnt to say those words. The answer, if it was a yes, wouldn’t feel too good either. Stop it, I scolded myself. You should care about Alexis, not this woman!

 I was cut out of my thoughts abruptly by a choking noise coming from Ace and a well-rounded laugh from Mason that dominated the silent room.

I frowned as Mason spoke between laughing. “With this woman? No way, probably slit my throat if I even came near her bedroom.” The thought of her killing him made me smile inwardly.

Ace mumbled something quietly under her breath and Mason once again laughed before walking out of the room yelling “I’ll find my own way!” over his tanned shoulder.

Then it was just Ace and I. The room suddenly became very, very small. Our eyes locked and you could see the sparks flying inbetween us. She stared right at me her strange blue eyes. They should be green I thought, Alexis’s had been an amazing green colour. Green would suit her more. But really that didn’t matter.

She had a small smile playing on her lips but the moment Mason was out of the room the smile dissapeared and jealousy crashed through me at the thought of Mason making her smile and not me. My fists clenched tightly to stop them from reaching out to her, Ace must have noticed since her beautiful orbs turned cold and her now harsh voice spoke.

I didn’t even hear her words, I just drunk in the sound of them, like an alcoholic with the bottle of ice whiskey.

My wolf was howling at me to step closer, screaming at me to stop resisting the pull. I moved only a centimetre closer to her and she froze. But my eyes stayed on her sparkling ones. My heart picked up and began racing wildly. I have to get to her, I thought. Mine My wolf cried.

But Alexis is mine I thought sadly. What is this woman doing to me? I looked her up and down. “You look so much like her.” I whispered under my breath. So much like her, my heart lurched.  I couldn’t control my body anymore, the pull was so strong. I ignored her hostile position and the coldness in her eyes and reached out to sweep away the hair covering her face. Ace’s eyes widened for a second but she recovered and subconsciously leaned into my hand.

She looked so innocent – “Baaaabbbyyy!” A trilling voice echoed in the kitchen. I groaned inwardly. Clara, bloody hell. Bitch was interrupting us again! Ace tensed then winced painfully before she leaped backwards as if i shocked her with 1000 volts. Disgust filled her face and made my wolf whimper at the pain of been looked at so harshly.

 She seemed to be arguing pretty deeply in her mind and different expressions flashed through her eyes. Sadness, hate, caring? No, not caring, I was so desperate I probably imagined that. Then her eyes hardened. I noticed that her hand was on her neck, pressing on the puckered scar as if it was bleeding. Did it hurt? Concern filled me then WAM! her fist came flying. Hard.  My head swung back with a SNAP, I closed my eyes at the pain and let myself fall back and slam into the hard tile kitchen floor.

She spat on the ground her aura giving off an incredibly dangerous pissed off vibe that smothered the room in darkness. Her hair was sticking out in odd places and her fists were lurking around her waist where a red knife rested. She seemed to be deciding whether to use it or not. Thankfully she didn’t.

“I can find my own way. Thanks.” She snarled before stomping loudly out of the room. I was still on the floor seemingly in shock. Clara was trying to pull me up but i slashed my hand out her grip and stormed out the opposite end of the house.

WHAT IS THAT CHICK’S PROBLEM!