Laylis & Jason

Chapter TwentyFour

We all stood frozen in our previous positions, silent. In hindsight, I would have rather had talked to Laylis alone, but now I'm talking to her in the small clearing in the 'small forest' followed by the dead end. And in front of Aspen, whoever he was. Not exactly prime conditions for this.

"Jason! What was.... What are you doing here?" Asks Laylis, looking a little embarrassed. Well, this is off to a great start. "Well..." I had to think. What is my objective. A thousand things were racing through my head. I could try to answer... "Who is he?" Or I can pass on the hot seat. "Answer the question!" Laylis yelled.

Before I could answer, Aspen detached my hand from Laylis's and grabbed her, moving her away from me. "You might just want to leave, man." Aspen says. "Why?" I asked. "Maybe you should instead." He walks in front of Laylis, standing face to face with me. "Because I'm not the one who cheated on her." He replies.

"Cheat? I didn't cheat on her!" I replied angrily. "Oh, really? That isn't what I heard." He says still keeping his cool. "I can speak for myself, Aspen." Laylis steps in. "I saw you, Jason. I saw you kiss Juliet at school. So, don't lie to me." "That? I was just trying to shut up Juliet since she was crying." I replied. It was the truth.

It was Monday, after Laylis's first Nothing, and after school was out. Right once I got out. Someone dropped their books, so I helped gather them. "Here." I say giving them to whoever dropped them. And Low and Behold, it was Juliet. "Jason!" She said, I guess we both didn't realize it was each other.

"Uh... Hi Juliet. Bye." I said quickly. Gotta get out of here, I have a bad feeling. Like the: Everybody-staring-at-you-because-a-girl-just-went-into-the-bathroom-crying feeling. "No! Wait!" She yelps. I stop and turn around. I stare at her, with a concerned look. Hopefully she doesn't actually spill her guts.

We stand there for like five seconds so I think of a good excuse to get away... "Well, I better leave, I don't want your boyfriend to see me near you." I say. Decent excuse. And it checks out. She had been with her boyfriend for as long as I saw her with him the first time. So I walk up to her, taking the exit behind her when...

"Garred broke up with me!" She says, bursting into tears. I stepped on a landmine. I stand there right in front of her. No! Not another Café incident! What will they do? Kick me out of school? I didn't know what to do... I saw her lips and kissed her. I kissed her long enough for her to stop. "Please don't cry. I don't want to be thrown out of school." I said cautiously.

She dries her tears, and looks me in the eye. "Sorry, for this and the Café. And thank you." She mutters as she begins to walk away. I just stand there in awe. Why does this happen to me? I go on with my day. I try to find Laylis, but she seems to have left already.

This is one of those things that you just don't talk about in relationships, or at least it was. Now I'm gonna have to spill all my guts. "She cried because her boyfriend broke up with her, and I didn't want to be the highlight of the school, so I kissed her to make her stop." Yeah, I suggest you do not attempt this in your life, won't go well.

After a second of Laylis staring at me with narrowed eyes she spoke. "Are you serious?" she asked plainly. "Yes, I'm serious. it is the truth." I say, calmly. "I can't believe you." She says and turns her back on me to go sit on a tree stump with her head in her hands. "You just said that like it was no big deal. Like it was perfectly sensible to kiss another girl while you were with someone else. Are you kidding me?" Aspen says in disbelief.

"I know it wasn't!" I retaliate. "It was a stupid thing to do. I feel ashamed and foolish. But I don't need your measly two cents every time I say something. It's not about what you think, it's about what Laylis does." We start to stare each other down. I promise, one more word from him and so help me...

"You're right." He says simply. "It's about Laylis. Laylis who has been hurting because of you. You hurt her, and you know what? It kind of makes me want to hurt you." I was on my last nerve with him. Clenching my fists, gritting my teeth. "Ya know, I was thinking the same thing. I would love to put a dent in your pretty boy face." I agree, saying it in a threatening whisper.

"Yeah, I bet you would. I'd love to knock some sense into you as well but, you know what? I'm not going to. And you know why? Because, obviously, Laylis is right here and I don't think I'd be helping her feel any better by getting in a fight. Though, if she asked me to, I'd be happy to oblige." He turns to look at Laylis who is walking towards us. "I don't know what to do." She says to us with a blank facial expression.

It was clear to me, at that moment. Her face, it said so much. Yet so blank, ironically. She hadn't decided if she liked me, or at least more than Aspen. She was confused about her feelings, and she didn't feel the same way about me as I did for her. "Laylis." I said in my calmest voice.

"I know I screwed up, and I hate myself for it. But, we both know that you have feelings for Aspen. I'm in love with you, Laylis, but I don't know if you feel the same way." At that moment she came and grabbed my hand.

"Laylis, if you like Aspen, then date him. I'm ok with just being in your life. It'll be like when we were friends. If he's the love of your life, go for it. I'll leave you alone." I started to walked away when she tugged on my hand. I looked back, and she slowly let go until I pulled away.

I went home and went in my room. I sat in my Corner of Wisdom instinctively. I did think though, about what I said. I had let Laylis go... Like I did my mom. She instantly popped in my head. I loved her like I loved Laylis, but I let her go. And I did the same for Laylis.

I came to the conclusion that true love isn't the ability to hold on, it's the ability to let go.