This Love

f i v e

Raven rolls over in the bed to face Clarke, the overhead light glaring down on Clarke's blue eyes, still sad, but no longer weeping. "Are you going to tell him?"

"Who?" Clarke asks, pushing herself off of the mattress to face her as well. "Finn?"

Raven's nod makes a quiet swishing sound against her pillow.

"He doesn't need to know," Clarke says, yet her voice didn't hold any strength. She sounded weak. "It's not like I'm going to see her again. She probably doesn't even go here."

Raven sighs, her eyes drooping tiredly. "It was a student exhibit, Clarke. A student exhibit. For this university."

Clarke releases an outburst of energy, screaming as she tugged viscously on her hair. "This is so fucked up. I have to avoid her. If you see her, you have to tell me so I can run in the opposite direction."

"No. To hell with that. A minute ago you were wanting to die because you ran away." Raven sighs, slipping an arm over Clarke's stomach and squeezing her close in a sloppy side embrace. "And I think for the first time, you know what you want to do. So do it."

"I don't know where she lives," Clarke begins to sob again, sighing and wiping viscously at her cheeks with frustration.

"Well, that's where your handy best friend comes into good use, because I do," Raven smirks again, smile widening when she feels Clarke stiffening against her hip.

"You phone stalked her?" She shoots up, eyes narrowed and lips straightened.

"Well, duh. You need this, C. Plus I got to see her face again which is a huge bonus for me."

Clarke laughed, shaking her head, and Raven just glanced back towards the blank ceiling. She was happy for her. After these two years, Clarke finally gets to have some closure. She finally gets to have some answers. She finally gets to have her.

"Now stop stalling for time and get your thirsty lesbian ass over to dorm 214."

"Raven," Clarke raised her eyebrows, and Raven received the look that screamed 'stop talking'.

"Like you said, I have a boyfriend. She has a - a girlfriend," Clarke stopped to inhale an unstable breath and said, "I don't want her for sex, I don't want her for love, I don't want her for comfort. I just want some damn answers," Clarke mumbled, pulling her pyjama pants off as she changed into some black skinny jeans and made her way over towards the door.

— • ❃ • —

She isn't going to her dorm room to see her face. No. That's not what she was doing. She's going to her dorm room for answers. And to apologise about the whole painting scenario. She wasn't going because she wanted to. She had no choice. But she did - and every single part of her body pushed her further towards dorm 214.

That's why. That's the only reason.

The fact that the room is on the other side of campus, a five minute walk throughout one side of the building didn't matter. The fact that - according to Raven - it is Lexa's lunch break is irrelevant. The fact that Clarke's stomach hasn't stopped flipping since she left the exhibit is definitely irrelevant.