Wrong Mate

Chapter 8 - Jordan

• Jordan •

Loss: one four letter word that holds fourteen definitions in counting; all which intertwine someway and somehow. Misplacing of keys, defeat in a game, something you just couldn't maintain and the biggest of all...death. Thinking about death was scary when I was younger and on the verge of becoming an adult but since there were only maybe five ways for me to die and thousands for mortals, it became less of a worry to me. Then, Lia got bitten.

It was mind-boggling to me, how even what was supposed to be immortal, could die. Apparently, everything could and would die, just to make space in the world for the new generation, like plants. I didn't particularly fancy the fact that my close mother like figure was dying but instead, I just didn't feel toward it. Having no emotions really did that to you.

As I crossed the threshold of the outside world into the small and cramped vampire home, I was met by everyone's sympathetic glare in the living room. I closed the door behind me silently and awaited the sound of someone's voice, but nothing.

"Is she dead yet?" I queried and the disgusted look on Carly's face, the third youngest in the house, was one that could kill. "What?"

"You need to turn them on Jordan, you're the only one here without emotions dude and she wants you to take her life. She bit me for trying," Aiden spoke up.

"Jordan," Ryan walked up to me cautiously with a stake in his hand, "Try."

"Try what?" My forehead creased at the sight of the sharpened wood. He set it in my hands and with his projected and strong voice, he spoke wise words.

"Try to be a man. You can't continue on acting like a child, Jordan we need emotions or else your heart is as cold as you. Lia made you who you were, the good Jordan we used to know and that changed when she came around but, it's not about her anymore. It's over and done with and you have to face this. So go up there and...well...get it over with." His words went through one ear and came out the other, but if they all wanted me to murder her, then so be it. I would.

I stomped up the stairs until I was atop, finding her bedroom before sauntering inside. I closed my eyes, took a deep breath and turned them on. Maybe some of Ryan's words stuck, but not for long, because I would be shutting them back off right after I committed this immoral homicide. Emotions were not my "thing".

She looked worse than when I'd last saw her, which wasn't at all long ago and the sight brought upon the feeling of a knife in my chest. I closed the door behind me and began to hyperventilate; the emotions that had been so long neglected were crashing in like a tsunami. She was watching me silently, body paling by the minute as she waited for me to come over.

"They hurt, don't they?" She croaked and I nodded, running over to her bedside and crawling in the bed with her. I felt like a child by Lia and she was the only one I'd ever cried in front of. She was important to me but I could never love her the way she loved me. I looked into her fading eyes, ceasing my uncontrolled breathing and forging a smile.

"Hi."

"Hey," she closed her eyes, face still close to mine. "Tell me how the emotions feel."

"I feel..." I trailed off, mind jumbled with a ton of feelings. "Hate for whoever did this to you, Love for her and...sadness and pain but-

"But?" Her lips upturned into a small smile and I laughed, sitting up beside her as I played with the stake.

"But there's a happy feeling."

"For who, for what? Paint a picture for me Jordan, with your good words, like you always do. You were such a good writer."

"Stop that," I kissed her forehead and let the feelings settle in, searching my mind for the words to describe the happy feeling. "The girl I told you about, you remember, yeah?"